Kuqonde okufuna ebudlelwaneni obusha
ABAZIYO ngothando bafanisa umuzwa walo nento engefaniswe nalutho. Abanye baze bathi lukwenza uzizwe sengathi undizela emafini noma uhlala endaweni yakho wedwa lapho kuwuwe nesithandwa sakho kuphela.
Kuningi-ke okungenziwa wuthando nxa lufika kumuntu - omunye lumshintsha abe ngumuntu ongcono kunalowo akade ewuye. Omunye lumshintsha aqale ukuba nemicabango emibi ngenxa yokuthi usuke engasenakho ukwethemba omunye umuntu.
Uthando singacishe silufanise nomlilo, into okungamele udlale ngawo ngoba ungakushisa usale unesilonda, noma uhanguke. Abantu esihlangana nabo empilweni kasibazi ukuthi lapho beqhamuka khona bashiye kunjani noma buphele kanjani ubudlelwano abakade bezibandakanye kubo.
Abanye abantu basheshe bangene ebudlelwaneni obusha inhliziyo ingakapholi. Lokhu kugcina sekunomthela ebudlelwaneni osuke uthi uyabuqala.
Kwesinye isikhathi ungabuka ubudlelwano bakho osanda kubuqala bubheka eceleni uze uzibuze wena uqobo ukuthi wenzeni, kanti qha umuntu onenkinga yilo othandana naye.
Iqiniso nje lithi sonke sinemithwalo nezinkinga esisuka nazo ebudlelwaneni esiphuma kubo ezigcina zinomthelela ongemuhle ebudlelwaneni osuke usukubo ngaleso sikhathi.
Kwesinye isikhathi uyaye uthole ukuthi uzothandana nomuntu ongakwethembi - hhayi ngoba kusuke kukhona okwenzile kodwa yingoba ephuma ebudlelwaneni obungazange bube nokwethembana.
Isibonelo nje, ungathandana nowesifazane ophingelwe yisoka lakhe. Uma eseqala ubudlelwano obusha nawe uzoba nenkinga yokukuthemba ngoba useke wagileka phambilini. Mhlawumbe uthole ukuthi uma ungalubambi ucingo uzocabanga ukuthi kukhona ohleli naye njalonjalo.
Kokunye uthandane nowesifazane ozokulandela yonke indawo lapho ukhona ngenhloso yokubheka ukuthi wenzani nobani, ngenxa yokuthi wake wabhadama isoka lakhe nentombi.
Uma kungenjalo uthole ukuthi ubenesoka elimhlukumezayo ngokomphefulo nangokumshaya. Uthando olunjengalolu ngokujwayelekile lusuke luzoba nzima ngoba usuke ubhekene nomuntu ofuna ukuthandwa kodwa futhi ovalele inhliziyo yakhe ebhodleleni.
Ngaphambi kokuba wedlulele ebudlelwaneni obusha kubalulekile ukuba ubheke amaphoyinti angezansi atholakala kwi- bustle.com.
Lokhu kuzokusiza ukwazi ukunikeza isithandwa sakho uthando futhi ukwazi ukulwemukela lolo onikwa lona:
*ZINIKE ISIKHATHI
Ngemuva kokuhlukana nesinqandamathe sakho zinike isikhathi ngaphambi kokuqhubekela phambili kobunye ubudlelwano. Zinike isikhathi sokuphola esikhundleni sokuba uvele wemboze izilonda sengathi awukaze ulimale.
*QALA IKHASI ELISHA
Uma uqala ubudlelwano obusha kubalulekile ukuba ususe yonke into ezokuhlanganisa nobudlelwano bakho obudala.
Lokhu kubalwa ngisho izinto owawuzithengelwe ngumuntu osuhlukene naye, ukuze ukwazi ukuqala ubudlelwano obusha ungaphazanyiswa yilutho.
*ZITSHELE UKUTHI USUFUNA UBUDLELWANO OBUSHA
Ukuba wedwana kakusho ukuthi weswele intokozo kodwa uyajabula ngisho uwedwa. Uma usufuna ukuqala ubudlelwano obusha zitshele ukuthi usuyaphuma emqondweni wokuthi usaphila impilo yakho wedwa.
*SHIYA IZINKINGA ZAKHO EMNYANGO
Ngokujwayelekile uma uqala ubudlelwano obusha uba nezinkinga ofika nazo. Kunokwenzeka ukuthi unenkinga yokwethemba isithandwa sakho esisha ngoba esaphambilini saphinga, noma sewusaba ukuvula inhliziyo yakho, unovalo lokuthi uzolimala futhi.
Ngisho kungabe yini ekuxakile kodwa okumele ukwazi ukuthi ubudlelwano kabufani.
*FUNDA KOKWEDLULE
Okuhle ngokushiya ubudlelwano obudala wukuthi uphuma nesifundo. Zazi wena kangcono. Kufanele ukuqonde okufuna ebudlelwaneni obusha.
*UNGAQHATHANISI
Ungaqhathanisi isithandwa sakho sakudala nesisha, akekho umuntu othanda ukuqhathaniswa.
* UNGAVUMELI UBUDLELWANO OBEDLULE BAHLULELE IKUSASA
Kunabantu okuthi uma belimalile ebudlelwaneni bafunge bagomele ukuthi ngeke baphinde bathande noma ngeke baphinde bathole ubudlelwano obufana nalobu abasuka kubo.
Ungavumeli izinkinga zobudlelwano zibe namandla phezu kwakho. Ukuvula inhliziyo uphinde uthande kutshengisa amandla onawo.
tzondi@ilanganews.co.za