Anx­i­ety trig­gers to avoid

Living and Loving - - FAMILY INSPIRATION -

Avoid­ing the fol­low­ing anx­i­ety trig­gers will pro­mote a sense of se­cu­rity and sta­bil­ity in your anx­ious child, giv­ing him the foun­da­tion for cop­ing with his hotwired brain and sen­si­tive per­son­al­ity:

FAM­ILY CON­FLICT. Turn down the drama and count to 10 if you have to, be­fore say­ing or do­ing some­thing you will, al­most def­i­nitely, re­gret later.

TALK­ING ABOUT TROU­BLES. Reg­u­larly talk­ing about money prob­lems and world pol­i­tics in front of your chil­dren can con­trib­ute to in­se­cu­rity.

PHYS­I­CAL PUN­ISH­MENT. This doesn’t solve any­thing, ar­gues An­drew, and in­creases bi­o­log­i­cal stress, which in turn fu­els anx­i­ety.

GOS­SIP. Neg­a­tive com­ments about school, teach­ers, other peo­ple, friends or any­one else cre­ates a pat­tern of neg­a­tiv­ity – a prime breed­ing ground for fear and anx­i­ety.

WATCH YOUR MOUTH. We all have bad days, and we’ve all done it: ridicule, sar­casm and sham­ing. Ob­serve your­self and “tone down your tone” − es­pe­cially when you’re feel­ing emo­tional.


Com­par­ing your child’s fears or anx­i­eties to your own should only be done pos­i­tively. For ex­am­ple, say­ing: “I used to feel scared of leav­ing my mom some­times. My teacher helped me to have fun while mom was away, and I en­joyed paint­ing and draw­ing un­til she came back to fetch me.” YELLS AND THREATS. It can be frus­trat­ing and ex­haust­ing when every­body else’s child seems quite happy, and yours isn’t. That’s OK, says An­drew, as no­body is built quite the same way. Con­stantly re­mind your­self there are al­ways so­lu­tions, and you are your child’s cham­pion – and firmly stop your­self from al­low­ing your fear of fail­ure as a par­ent to leak into con­ver­sa­tion with your child. Get­ting back to ba­sics – sleep, good food, play, laugh­ter and a firm, lov­ing fam­ily base – are ideal an­ti­dotes to an anx­ious mind­set. Yes, you may need to seek pro­fes­sional help for your lit­tle one if the is­sue per­sists, but fo­cus on build­ing a strong foun­da­tion first. LL

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