BREAK­THROUGH

Slow = the big O.

Men's Health (South Africa) - - CONTENTS -

Ever turn down sex? nah, you're a guy. Well a re­cent study in the jour­nal Sex Roles says, some­times Well, BS. Forty a re­cent Ever per­cent feign turn study down in­ter­est of in men the sex? to re­vealed jour­nal ap­pear Nah, you’re Sex that more Roles they a mas­cu­line guy. says com­ments or to from avoid the up­set­ting par­tic­i­pants their below.) part­ner. Grow­ing (See up, men are so­cialised to em­brace their sex­u­al­ity, to en­cour­age and ini­ti­ate sex, says study au­thor pro­fes­sor Sarah Murray. They may feel com­pelled to have sex even when they’re not in the mood. That can lead to di­min­ished de­sire in the long run. So let her know you’re not feel­ing it – and these are the key words – “right now”, Murray says. Of­fer an al­ter­na­tive (spoon­ing, a movie) and a com­pli­ment. And ini­ti­ate next time. “I’m pretty much ready all the time.” Michael, 33 “It’s how guys are built. A guy will not say no.” Sizwe, 55

“There is much that is not un­der­stood about men’s in­ter­nal life. And I think in large part men are be­ing short­changed as be­ing very sim­ple crea­tures.” Robert, 40

“Guys think that if they don’t want it all the time they’re some­how in­fe­rior, or that they’re not go­ing to look like a mas­cu­line male in front of their bud­dies – or po­ten­tially, in front of women as well.” Carl, 31

“I do feel a so­ci­etal pres­sure as a man, that if I’m be­ing a ‘real man,’ I should al­ways want any sex that is avail­able... When I say no to sex, and I do, there is a part of me that feels guilt.” Mandla, 33

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