Mzanzi’s magic laughs are

Bill Gates

farted in an Apple store and stank out the entire place. But it’s their own fault for not having Windows. – Source: kickvick.com

Car Guards by Tlolo_G

I am not a big fan of car guards because they are sophisticated, especially the car guards in Midrand. You have to pay them whether you like it or not.

These guys now have swiping machines, so you can’t even use the excuse that you don’t have coins.

And greeting a car guard is as if you have just signed a contract that you need to pay him. This is why I’m moving to Hartbeespoort.

I will get a house by the dam and a boat because there is no chance that when reversing my boat there will be a boat guard standing next to it saying, “Faka is’nchane lapho (Won’t you give me small change)”. Black people can’t swim and park boats at the same time.

Kopa Kholi (A bribe for Metro cops) by Pablo

I think I am the smartest guy in South Africa. Every time I leave my house I have a case of unopened soft drinks like Coke, Fanta and Sprite in my car because I know in Joburg I am bound to go through a roadblock and we all know traffic cops always find something wrong with your car, even if it’s new.

Like one of them asking: “Why does your car smell so new? That’s a fine.”

So when asking for a bribe, traffic police always say Kopa Kholi (can I have cool drink money) and that’s when I take out my drinks and ask them: “Which one do you want sir? I have Coke, Fanta and Sprite.”

Orlando by Thabiso Mhlongo

The US is a very dangerous place. Just recently, there