Let’s adopt the ideal of ‘enoughness’
It’s time for women to take back their power, says Cheryl Carolus
IN the past few weeks, we have seen the best and the worst of our country. We have seen the devastating strike on the platinum belt. We have seen the consequences on workers and their families. And we have seen a platinum company and its CEO announce executive compensation that invoked strong reactions.
We have seen our fifth election take place in a manner that has made us all proud of our young democracy.
We have seen our new leaders from a diverse range of parties being sworn in to serve in our new parliament. We have seen a new take on dress codes and we take pride in the fact that 43% of the newly elected MPs are women.
On balance, I believe we have every reason to feel proud of what we have built in a mere 20 years. In my extensive travels, I am always pleasantly surprised by how well we compare in many respects.
When the plane I’m on comes in to land back home, I always smile because I love my crazy country and my people. But, as the plane comes lower and lower, I also become painfully aware of the stark differences that exist cheek by jowl in South Africa. And I am reminded of the ticking time bombs we sit on. The level of poverty and inequality that persists is not sustainable and is not morally defensible.
I have no doubt this country of ours has the ability to become an even greater nation and globally competitive on all fronts, including, yes, even in soccer.
We have an abundance of natural resources. We have a spectacularly beautiful country increasingly recognised as a world-class tourism destination. We have world-class medical facilities and academic institutions. But this has not translated into benefits for all.
The inequalities in opportunities and benefits are what stand between us and the greatness we are capable of. How is it defensible that women are still consistently overlooked for opportunities? How can we explain the fact that the conditions in townships are so scandalous? How do we expect to cope with the explosive consequences when the pressure cooker of anger and disillusionment explodes even more forcefully?
And it will — and of course we must hold government at all levels accountable for its failures in this regard.
How do we address this? I believe through defining a value system based on “enoughness”, social solidarity, inclusivity and diversity. Without these We are poorer as a nation because men and women are degraded by sexism in much the same way that racism denigrated black and white values, we will never achieve the social cohesion we need.
Turkeys do not vote for Christmas. I know a few men who are fervent fighters for the rights and dignity of women and girls. But there are not enough of them. It falls upon us, as women, to lead the charge to liberate women and men alike from the profoundly harmful impacts of the bigotry that sexism is.
We are poorer as a nation because men and women are degraded by sexism in much the same way that racism denigrated black and white.
We must shape different ways of being men, of being women — ways in which being different and equal are not contradictory.
There is a bumper sticker I really like. It says “Women who want to be like men have no ambition”. I love being a woman. I often say that some of my best friends are men. I even married one. I cannot love or marry someone I do not respect. I cannot love someone who does not respect me or who treats me like an inferior human. I cannot love someone who feels threatened by my success and my aspirations.
We, as women, should not wait for men to affirm us. We need to identify and flaunt our assets and strengths. We need to have ambitions.
I want to firmly debunk the myth that women drag down other women. I have certainly come across some awful women. But I have come across many more awful men who have tried to stop my progress.
I am very proactive in seeking out people who add value to my life. I do not sit around and wait for good people — women or men — to find me. I go and approach people I wish to emulate and ask them for support and help.
We should recognise that the private sector, especially our big corporates, should hang its head in shame and acknowledge that gender is one area in which the government and the public sector outshine it. I can say with confidence there are probably more token men in government and parliament than there are women. Just watch who sleeps during parliamentary debates.
One way in which you can make a huge impact is through mentorship. I have been joined by 35 successful South African women to launch the Girl Child Institute of Mentorship. We have committed to this for a year. This initiative is generously supported by Cell C and is closely aligned with its Take a Girl Child to Work programme.
I also want to call on you to adopt a culture of “enoughness”. I am appalled by how we sometimes measure success by material things and ostentation. The number one spot that we should hang our heads in shame for is our position as the most unequal society in the world. This is also a huge threat to our stability as a society. We can only build so many high walls around ourselves. Let us begin to declutter our lives and free ourselves from the bling that adds no value to our quality of life.
I call on you to commit to one not-forprofit organisation that seeks to impact positively on the lives of those less fortunate than you. I call on you to make your voices heard. Take the joy of voting and give it legs in between elections. Speak out when our elected betray our hopes or when they fall short of the oaths they took. Make your voice heard beyond your suburban dinner parties. And don’t just raise it around the “Me! Me! Me!” issues.
Let us take back our power. We brought this country to where we are — for better or for worse. I would prefer it to be for better. I have skin in the game. I want a return on my investment. We will have the future we deserve. We can be hapless victims, useless moaners — or we can be proud builders. We can do this. Our children deserve it.
ý Carolus is executive chairwoman of Peotona Group Holdings. This is an edited version of her keynote address at the Quality Life Ninth Annual Women’s Leadership Summit in Johannesburg last month