Discuss the atrocities of the world with children, or else
HUNDREDS of children who accompanied their parents to a Free Palestine march in Durban last week were exposed to images of atrocities in the war-torn area, and could suffer negative consequences.
This is according to educational psychologist Fatima Adam, who said that images of war — such as those from the fighting in the Gaza Strip — and of the bodies of those killed on flight M17 in the Ukraine, could lead to them becoming the perpetrators or victims of bullying.
But, said Adam, children’s development could be harmed if parents — who usually instinctively try to avoid dealing with such topics — failed to discuss what was happening.
“Any image of violence is traumatic for children. It is likely that some children may experience shock and panic at the sight of such pictures. Some children may experience anxiety related to death and war.”
Adam said if the issues were not discussed, youngsters could imitate the acts of violence they had seen, whereas others “become inhibited, avoid any confrontation and may be susceptible to bullying”.
Children may also start having nightmares, wetting their beds or fear being separated from their parents. “It is therefore important for parents to discuss safety measures,” she said.
When children were accidentally exposed to im- ages of war, parents should discuss the matter and encourage children to express their feelings rather than suppress them.
She said: “Parents should explore alternatives for conflict resolution. For example, what could Israel and Palestine do instead of fighting? They could engage in negotiations, recognise each other as human beings.
“Parents should stress the importance of respecting other humans even if we don’t agree with their beliefs. Children could make cards for the children affected in the war and express their feelings: this can teach them empathy. In addition, teach children how to manage bullying and aggressive interactions with children at school.”
Teaching children these skills assist “in developing good conflict-resolution skills and they also learn that violence should not be an option to resolve conflicts”, said Adam.
Former Childline KZNhead and social worker Linda Naidoo said parents had to perform a delicate balancing act, educating but also shielding their children.
“We cannot shield them from what should equip them to manage situations and never numb them to human suffering, but [teach them] to have an appreciation for life . . .”