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Wis­dom of the an­cients

Supra Mahumapelo re­fuses to re­lease North West from his claws. Af­ter he was forced by Luthuli House to va­cate the po­si­tion of premier, Black Je­sus criss­crossed the prov­ince in search of a per­fect pawn to re­place him. He found a sep­tu­a­ge­nar­ian, Job Mok­goro, who was this week sworn in as North West’s new premier. Mok­goro was top of a list of three names Mahumapelo sent to Luthuli House. Those in the know say Mahumapelo is hop­ing the 70-yearold will sleep on the Job while Black Je­sus and his cronies con­tinue ru­in­ing the prov­ince.

Step aside, ju­nior

Re­mem­ber how dif­fi­cult it was for Mahumapelo to say the word “res­ig­na­tion” when he was fired a month ago? He un­suc­cess­fully tried to con­vince us that his exit was an “early re­tire­ment”. Well, you have to have been very use­less if your em­ployer forces you to re­tire at 50 and yanks a 70-year-old from pen­sioned tran­quil­ity to re­place you.

No coun­try for old men

The Red Beret Brigade was the first party to re­ject Mok­goro’s ap­point­ment, say­ing it was more proof that the ANC had no cred­i­ble lead­ers. But the op­po­si­tion should be cel­e­brat­ing this ap­point­ment. Re­mem­ber what hap­pened af­ter the ANC took another el­der, Ben Fihla, and made him mayor of Nel­son Man­dela Bay metro when he was al­most Man­dela’s age? Maybe the op­po­si­tion is one premier away from tak­ing over North West.

Youth lead­er­ship wasted on young

Mok­goro’s ap­point­ment reignited the old de­bate about gen­er­a­tional mix within the ANC — which means the ap­point­ment of “young” lead­ers to cushy jobs. The ar­gu­ment for more young lions in po­si­tions of power makes sense given that the op­po­si­tion is led by rel­a­tively young lead­ers, but youth­ful lead­ers in the ANC have not cov­ered them­selves in glory. Who would want the jugs­mash­ing Andile Lungisa as a premier, for ex­am­ple?

Time to walk the walk

It was Un­cle Gweezy’s birth­day on Thurs­day. His boss, McBuf­falo, wished him well on Twit­ter and chal­lenged the for­mer mineworker to join him for his morn­ing walks. Gweezy retweeted the birth­day mes­sage, al­though he did not re­spond to the chal­lenge. But McBuf­falo’s spokes­woman, Khusela Diko, would not al­low Gweezy to get away that easy. She re­minded the min­is­ter of mineral re­sources of the chal­lenge the fol­low­ing day on so­cial me­dia. Come on, Un­cle Gweezy, those walks will do won­ders to re­duce the Jojo tank on the waist­line.

The face of lo­cal gov­ern­ment

eThek­wini mayor Zandile Gumede is not both­ered by re­ports that the Hawks may be cir­cling her fol­low­ing rev­e­la­tions of sus­pected cor­rup­tion in the Banana City. In­stead, she is some­how em­bold­ened — even dish­ing out her wit when deal­ing with the op­po­si­tion. This week she put the op­po­si­tion in its place when the DA com­plained that her face was all over the city’s bill­boards.

“I know you be­come very ir­ri­tated by see­ing a woman mayor, es­pe­cially one who is from the ANC. You will live with me. I am putting more and more. At the air­port, once you jump off you will see my face laugh­ing at you. To­day I am do­ing a photo shoot, I am go­ing to be all over,” she said. A friend of Hog­a­rth sug­gested it may not be such a bad thing hav­ing her face ev­ery­where as the bill­boards may come in handy should she be­come a wanted sus­pect.

No trans­port on the gravy train

An ally of Hog­a­rth who was eaves­drop­ping on the phone con­ver­sa­tion of a se­nior ANC leader says he fi­nally heard ev­i­dence that the party is se­ri­ous about fight­ing cor­rup­tion. The leader was on the phone with some­one re­quest­ing fi­nan­cial as­sis­tance. He quizzed the caller about the num­ber of peo­ple he had gone to be­fore “ap­proach­ing head­quar­ters” to as­sist. The money re­quest was then turned down. When the leader dropped the call, he said to an ac­quain­tance: “These Cosas boys are tak­ing chances. They say they need money for trans­port. But you may find it’s spend­ing money for the week­end!”

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