‘I’VE NEVER GONE ANYWHERE BY KAYAK ON PURPOSE’
HOW OFTEN DO YOU TRAVEL?
It depends what you mean by travel. If you mean exotic locations, then now and again. If you mean Joburg and back and Joburg and back and Joburg and back — pretty much every week.
DESCRIBE YOUR FIRST HOLIDAY YOU REMEMBER AS A CHILD
Running around kaalgat in the Agter Pakhuis area of the Cederberg Mountains. Feels like yesterday … Hang on. That was yesterday. Sigh.
WHAT IS THE MOST DIFFICULT, REMOTE OR ADVENTUROUS DESTINATION YOU’VE EVER BEEN TO?
I summitted Mount Kilimanjaro in 2011. Sometimes it feels as if life is like climbing a mountain and then I remember the time I climbed an actual mountain and it was much harder.
WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TRAVEL ONCE YOU ARE ABROAD?
My friend and most famous adventurer Riaan Manser says it’s either by bike or kayak, and I think I agree. In fact the first time I went to Los Angeles I hired a mountain bike and rode all over the city, which was cool, especially the five-hour trip through Topanga Canyon to Santa Monica. One morning I rode through a minor earthquake and didn’t notice. I’ve never travelled anywhere by kayak on purpose.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE CITY HERE OR ABROAD?
Amsterdam. I love the bikes, the dykes and the Hollandse Harings (herrings), which slip down your throat like well-oiled penguins. That sounds like a Dr Seuss poem for adults.
I also like Vancouver, which is like Cape Town, but safe. And wet. And cold. But it’s home to my cousin Kyla, who is awesome.
DO YOU PREFER ROUGHING IT OR LUXURY WHEN TRAVELLING? DESCRIBE THE BEST EXPERIENCE YOU’VE HAD OF WHATEVER YOU CHOOSE
Roughing, with a splash of luxury. I would have loved to follow six days of climbing Kili with a luxury hotel in Zanzibar, but I went home to change nappies. So that’s more roughing it with a splash of roughing it.
WHAT HAS BEEN YOUR WORST TRAVEL EXPERIENCE?
I once stayed in Sydney with my colleague Riaad Moosa. We had matching windowless smoking rooms, equipped with beds on wheels. Riaad jumped on his bed and landed up in the toilet. Wait, you said best experience, right?
ODDEST THING YOU’VE EXPERIENCED/THAT HAPPENED WHILE TRAVELLING?
A massage in Arequipa, Peru. After the masseur insisted I change in front of him, he proceeded to bump the table a number of times during the session, at one point briefly flicking my right testicle, and then threw a towel over my head.
WHAT DO YOU HATE ABOUT TRAVELLING OR HOLIDAYS?
When the baby is screaming and you stand up to try to rock it to stop it from screaming and the flight attendant threatens to have you arrested while the plane is taking off. And when the baby just got to sleep in one of those bassinet thingies and it’s 2am and the plane experiences a bit of turbulence and then you have to wake the baby and remove it and strap it to your lap and then it starts screaming again. So just baby screaming in any location.
WHAT ELEMENTS – DESTINATION, PEOPLE, ATTRACTIONS, ETC – MAKE UP YOUR PERFECT HOLIDAY?
● Mountain climbing
● Chillaxing (how old AM I?) ● Fun with kids
● Sex with wife
● All expenses paid.
NAME ONE PLACE YOU REALLY WANT TO GO, NOW OR AT LEAST SOME DAY?
The Mentawai Islands in Indonesia, on a boat trip. Preferably I’m not rowing the boat.
Rabinowitz’s new show, Dry White, runs at the Baxter Concert Hall from December 18 until January 12. Book through webtickets.co.za
KICKER A beautiful view of Amsterdam, Netherlands.
SOME DAY The Mentawai Islands, Indonesia.