Mediation plan to aid broken families
● For the past six months a Johannesburg father has not been able to see or speak to his daughter following a dispute between him and the child’s mother.
The 53-year-old says he has spent almost R1.5m just to try to gain access to the six-year-old. He has been to three different courts a total of 11 times, either to apply for shared custody or to defend himself against accusations of sexual assault, neglect and grooming.
“I am heartbroken and have a deep ache in my soul,” he said. “I wake up every night worrying about her, worrying about the damage of having no father in her life.”
Feeling let down by the legal system, the father is now placing his hopes in a proposed alternative system that aims to resolve family disputes outside court.
In a discussion paper open for public comment until Friday, the South African Law Reform Commission proposes an integrated approach to resolving family disputes, particularly those involving children. It says an approach based on mediation and arbitration would not only save families the prolonged and “mostly adversarial” court process, but would provide “therapeutic justice”.
SA does not have a comprehensive family law framework, the commission argues, saying the fragmented court system “is further confusing and burdensome to users, expensive to operate and fails to satisfy many people”.
The paper adds: “We also see the mounting pressure of unmet family legal needs on the courts where large numbers of unrepresented litigants struggle to use a system designed for highly trained professionals.
“Families should be empowered to resolve their disputes without additional emotional trauma.”
Felicity Guest, founder of the nonprofit Child Maintenance Difficulties SA, said the paper was “brilliant” and might influence more fathers to be involved in their children’s lives, but it needed proper implementation.
“Our government has a poor history in implementing brilliant concepts and legislation. We just have to look at our constitution,” she said.
Given the high divorce rate, “remedial action post-marriage should be part of marriage contracts so that parents are better informed, should divorce happen”.
The proposed new system, which would act as a clearing house before disputes go to court, would provide families with mandatory education programmes to help them resolve their disputes.
The Johannesburg father said mediation would have to be done in good faith, otherwise “it can be manipulated to prolong the lack of contact between the child and the parent who is denied access, and do more damage in the end”.
Charl Botha, spokesperson for the Fathers’ Rights Movement SA, said the proposed system would be welcome, “if the government gives the resolution centre powers to enforce orders and prosecute defaulters”.
Remedial action post-marriage should be part of marriage contracts so parents are better informed, should divorce happen Felicity Guest of Child Maintenance Difficulties SA