Death comes once; make your life worth living
Clear the clutter and plunge fully into your one and only life, writes
We spend an extraordinary amount of time and money, and worry, trying either to extend our lives or, perhaps, defer death. There’ sa difference, and that’s what I think it’s all about. The person who will be least affected by your death will be you; your survivors bear the brunt of it.
Death is final, that much we know. I think. For so many, of different religions and persuasions, the fascination with the afterlife seems even more profound than the purpose of life itself — such is the character of mystery …
All of us, in some way or another, respect, if not defer to, the power of the unknown. We live (or at least we ought to live) a life good enough to ensure not too much punishment after death, if indeed such a consequence exists.
The force and fear of the unknown is a valuable, vital part of our lives. It’s the inability to neither see nor predict the future that makes the present more important. I can’t imagine what life would be like if we knew the future, particularly if we knew when we were going to die.
What would you do if the date was set (perhaps it is) and you knew it? It would be okay if it was the same age for everyone, say “three score years and ten”, albeit a somewhat outdated estimate for the normal span of life. It would somehow be acceptable if we all had an equal opportunity at lifespan, but it’d certainly be boring in its certainty.
If you knew, for sure, the date of your death, would it fundamentally change your behaviour? Hell, yes! I bet it would.
But how?
Would you take more risks? You should embrace more adventure, but we all have different appetites for that anyway — and there’d be no guarantee of the quality of life, only longevity. If adventure led to injury or disability (physical or mental), you’d still have to live with that, albeit for a finite period of time.
What would you sign for now if you could be guaranteed good health for only the contracted period, and uncertainty thereafter? I suggest that would depend on how old you are already. A bit like money, you should cut a deal on enough before you put in a lot of effort to have too much of it.
I’m not convinced of the virtue (or the reward) of living a deferred life. Sure, you should live a “good” life, a life of kindness, empathy and tolerance, but those drivers should be for their own sake, in the present, not because they promise reward, or their absence retribution, in the afterlife.
Of course, current actions affect future outcomes, no matter what you may believe. I’m a firm believer in karma.
As always, there’s a balance, and that balance is a different mix for everyone. We don’t all value the same things the same way.
Whatever your preferred basket of things may be, I’d recommend you have more of them. Jump into the water that is your life more often than you sit on the side contemplating it, or just dipping your toe in to check the temperature.
Old age isn’t for sissies, and most of us are going to live longer than we’ll end up wanting to. It’s typically less and less dignified and more and more of a burden on those who love us and have to care for us in our states of decline and dependence.
I can find little favour in living beyond your self-service date, but there are the joys our children bring us, and watching the evolution of society as we age — the progress of technology and humanity or, as I feel more often than not, its decline.
I sometimes wonder whether humanity has peaked; whether we’ve seen the best of us? Perhaps that’s a generational thing. Perhaps all generations think that their particular lives and times were the best. I do. Maybe they were. Our pasts are certainly as good as they’re going to get, so get over it and get on with living.
I’ve said it before and it bears repeating. The only life worth living will be the one found once you remove the clutter, perceptions and influences of others that stand in the way of being your true self.
If and when you get there (or close enough to not want to be anyone else) then start wandering off the beaten paths made by others.
Live a little, FFS!
So what if living too fast means you’ll die earlier (and have a good-looking corpse, as the saying goes). That’s surely better than being dead while you’re still alive. I don’t like funerals or corpses; thankfully we only die once.
Never submit to forces (or relationships) that make you smaller. Look instead for the wind and currents that lift you up, jump in, and have a full go.