Grasping suicidal behaviour
THE South African Depression and Anxiety Group assembled a team of experts last week to share advice on how parents could best deal with teenage suicide. This was part of teenage suicide prevention week.
Clinical psychologist Liane Lurie said it was significant that parents of teenagers who attempted suicide acknowledged that the act of trying to end one’s life was not due to seeking attention or an act of rebellion.
“We tell parents not to just reduce it to attention-seeking but see it as a desperate cry for help, whether it was planned or impulsive.”
Lurie said how parents carried themselves played a vital role in the recovery process.
“Parents are often faced with a huge amount of helplessness and are overwhelmed. They also get exceptionally angry. Parents also need trauma debriefing and psycho-education to equip them with the skills on how to move forward.”
“They also need to process this event because it would manifest into post-traumatic stress disorder. They need to put themselves first because you would need to be in the best possible space in order to provide the best possible space for the teenager.”
Keeping the suicide attempt a secret from family or other social agents may not be the best solution, she said.
“Parents need to ask themselves what message they are sending to their teenagers about themselves if they tried to conceal the fact that they tried to kill themselves.
“Allow the adolescent to have a sense of agency, a sense of control, ask them if you want to share their secret. What would they feel comfortable with sharing and to whom.”
Lurie said there were numerous reasons why teenagers resorted to suicide, which might be after struggling with depression or anxiety, but there was to a certain degree a role played by genes.
“When we are treating patients, we always take a biopsy to look at genetic, medical and social factors. We also look at family life in order to get a comprehensive picture of what is going on with the teenager.
“We know that if a direct family member has suffered from depression, and there is a history of depression and anxiety in the family, the teenager is more likely to also have those genes.”
Lurie shared some tips parents may follow after a suicide attempt
• They need to assess the situation around the attempt and take their teenager to a medical facility. Professional health experts will then determine whether the teenager needs counselling.
• They need to make sure their home is safe by taking away all things that pose a danger and could be used in another suicide attempt.
• Be on a 24-hour suicide watch. This meant that parents should make sure their teenagers drank medication if they had to, and monitor their online presence and social life.
• Parents need to examine themselves about what the child’s difficulties may say about their family system and issues that may have not been dealt with.
• Inform, in agreement with the child, others including a school or religious or cultural group about the situation at hand.
• Ask critical questions and propose a suicide contract where the parent and teenager agree on some things like attending counselling.
Lurie said parents should be careful not to assume that the teenager had recovered until they agreed with the treatment team because following a suicide attempt, chances of another were high.