Man ‘tired of abuse by his police officer wife’

A LOCAL man who alleged genderbased violence (GBV) against his police officer wife says he is tired of being her victim.

According to the 49-year-old man, who requested anonymity, the latest incident happened when he tried to talk to his 45-year-old policewoman wife, based in Durban.

“I asked for us to sit down and discuss us not getting along and the abuse I suffered at her hands. All hell broke loose after I asked her if she still remembered her position at home, to which she violently responded with a hard punch on the lips,” he said.

He said he pushed her away from him and was trying to understand what happened when she returned and grabbed his private parts until he became weak.

“She only stopped after I had stopped moving, while blood was gushing out of my private parts and then she fetched a broom which she used to beat me with until it broke,” he said.

The man said problems in their marriage began five years ago, after his wife got acquainted with new friends. He recalled an incident in 2020 where he was pistol-whipped by her after she accused him of cheating on her. He said his wife often beat him up, then pointed a gun at him when he became angry, and would often do it in front of their children.

The couple have apparently been sleeping in separate bedrooms for the past three years and were in the process of divorcing. They appeared at the Umbumbulu Magistrates Court on Tuesday, and were counter-suing on charges of assault. The case was moved to September 1 and they were both out on warning.

The man said he had left his house and moved back home with his family.

According to Sonke Gender Justice’s co-executive director, Bafana Khumalo, they were appalled by the reports of the incident of abuse, and that it was concerning as it was allegedly caused by a police officer, adding that such acts undermined the response efforts against the high levels of GBV.

Khumalo noted there was “a general problem in the country in both the understanding and interpretation of the progressive GBV legislation.

“We often hear of people misinterpreting these laws as only being applicable in holding abusive men accountable. Nothing can be further from the truth. GBV legislation applies to all genders. Crime is crime, whoever the perpetrator is.

“We often hear anecdotes that men who are abused by women are not taken seriously when they report their cases with the police. This is wrong,” he said.

Khumalo said the problem was not the law, but its application and that it was important for justice to prevail.

He encouraged men to speak out and to move away from thinking that it was a shame to show vulnerability.

Blessed Gwala, IFP spokesperson for community safety and liaison in the KZN Legislature, said they were appalled by the incident, especially considering that the alleged perpetrator was an officer of the law.

Gwala said what had happened could be something encountered by other men who were afraid to come out publicly about it.