PILLS, SPILLS N A TOUCH OF EYE CANDY ‘
ON Thursday night moi traaaaaavelled all the way to Emperor s Palace, Kempton
’ Park to mingle with some six packs, I mean sports peeps.
Anyways, moi went to witness the nominees announcement for the Gauteng Sports Awards due to be held later this month.
What a random list it was. Moi didn t recog
’ nise even one nominee.
Who came up with that list?
And what was worse, moi didn t see
’ any sportsmen there. A sports event sans sportsmen? Imagine the disappoint- ment.
Especially since the real reason I was there was to perv the beefcake. Someone explain quickly! Organiser Thami Kotlolo?
Oh, one sports presenter moi did notice was MC Kwena Moabelo, who did a fine job.
I like people who get to the point and he did just that. Perhaps he doesn t like to
’ overexercise his jaw. Thank the Lord!
The dooh opened with the Muffinz.
What happened to opening with the Lord s prayer or Die Stem?
’ Oops, I mean Nkosi Sikelel iAfrika. Oh dear. That s not quite cricket,
’ is it? I mean hockey...
Excuse me while I crawl back under my rock. Anyways back to the Muffinz. I was seeing them for the first time. Must say I was impressed. Still think we could ve opened
’ with a few religious words, though.
Next up was MEC Lebogang Maile with a brief speech. Didn t hear much but my ears
’ perked up when he referred to tablets (gifts the sponsors gave away on the evening) as tabloids. Yhu! Didn t rehearse our speech
’ did we, Mr Maile?
For future ref, those gifts are tablets. No, darling, not drugs. Don t get too excited. I mean
’ those iPad thingies... What you re reading now is a
’ tabloid. Say it with me again...
Then there was Driemanskap sorry, who? … Oh yes, that noisy group that almost burst my eardrums.
All we heard was an annoying background that no-one paid attention to cos they were desperately
‘ searching for earplugs.
Who booked them and why were there no earplugs?
In the midst of my earplug search I bumped into the yummy DJ AJ, Arthur Mafokate s carbon copy.
’ It s so sad that I couldn t go on
’ ’ stage and give him a thank you kiss for saving the night and helping us recover from the torture we d just
’ endured. Oh, but he s so cute.
’ Moi has a crush.
Is cradle snatching still frowned upon?
Omigosh! Just when everyone was wrapping up Kelly Khumalo made a tacky grand entrance with sissie in tow, both wearing ENORMOUS faux fur coats.
We thought we were in for a rendition of the Teddy Bears Picnic but all they did was pose for pics and flirt with some journos before bearing right into the crowd of arbs.
Most of the seri-ass peeps had left by then. Oh, you ll never guess who
’ moi bumped into at the dooh. Theo Nhlengethwa of Boom Shaka fame.
Still with that gorgeous baby face. He told Shwashwi he s working
’ on a new album and that he s been
’ frequenting the gym. With stunning results, I must add. OMG, I don t know who to
’ choose between him and AJ.
But why have one when you can have both? What? Anyone?