When bad things come in threes

Why mishaps come in threes remains a mystery. Then again, perhaps the source of this belief was an oke who could only count to three.

So, was it just coincidence that, one, my moke’s automatic windows refused to open, two, the guest lav pan sprung a leak and, three, the hose linking tap to washing machine burst while we were out buying toilet paper and renewing our script for blood pressure pills.

Not being able to open a car window presents formidable challenges. Try yelling at the security guard to open the gates through thick glass. Luckily, the blood chilling face he spied had him falling over his feet to open up. Or buying the local rag from a seller at a busy intersection. Desperate to get hold of my copy, I opened the door. Wrong. The door and the seller were nearly sideswiped by a speeding taxi. On to the two water problems. Opening the garage door was like opening floodgates. To get to the gushing tap I was forced to wade through six centimetres of built-up water that had started seeping through the linen cupboard housing my Heidi’s four decades’ wool collection. The shrinkage is sure to pave the way for smaller and tighter jerseys.

Trying to repair the burst hose with Sellotape, Band Aid and insulation tape proved futile, so it cost me a trip to one of those dirty little shops littered with scrap washing machines, tumble dryers and fridges. The guy behind a messy counter hailed from Croatia, and at first couldn’t fathom what I wanted, and after flashing everything from fridge sealants to vacuum cleaner filters, we at last came across the elusive hose.

The guest lav leak was more subtle. ‘Twas while I was sitting down to have my early morning read when my feet felt a creeping wetness. The little pink mat was soaked. The rubber joining the main water pipe to the pan had perished. Luckily this repair job proved a doddle. Amazing what can be done with Prately’s putty – I mean, what’s good enough for a spaceship is good enough for a lav pan.

And the end of the dreaded threes.

But we have since heard of brothers Quentin and Burger aka BQ, who are geniuses at fixing anything. So I’m ready for the next triple.