Cinderella: will the shoe ever fit?

The modern version of the pantomime Cinderella has been playing to full houses with high-profile actors. Like Cyril “Buffalo” Ramaphosa as Cinderella, Ace “Dairy” Magashule and Busisiwe “Tippex” Mkhwebane (ugly step sisters Cheryl and Beryl), Gwede “Ladies’ Man” Mantashe (ugly stepmother Lady Devilla), Jacob “Umshini Wam” Zuma (Mayor Domo), John “Dee Aay” Steenhuisen (Prince Charming) and Helen “God” Zille (Fairy Godmother).

The plot and the ability of the actors to portray living people are captivating. The rest of the cast, like Dumpling (Juju Malema), have few or no speaking parts.

Unlike the original storyline, the opening scene takes place at Albert Luthuli House – not in the kitchen. But the pressure exerted on poor Cinderella by the ugly stepmother and sisters to do the dirty work of cleaning up the after party is the same.

While thus occupied, Lady Devilla, Cheryl and Beryl slip out to have clandestine meetings with Mayor Domo at the Sandown home of good, embedded buddies (who are holidaying in the shadow of the Taj Mahal).

They appear in the credits as Buttons, Pitch and Catch – but don’t ever make an appearance.

On the way, the threesome stop over at Sundowner Shebeen, popular watering hole of politicians and lobbyists intent on negotiating lucrative government contracts. It is here Eskom deals were forged. At the coal face, as it were.

But they espy a lone minister seated at the pub crying in his pretzels. They ignore him, down their drinks and make a hasty retreat.

Much of the plot is about the meeting with Mayor Domo and how plans are made to rid them of Cinderella, whom they suspect is having a clandestine affair with important people. They’re still unaware of the influence of Fairy Godmother, the ball to which she transports Cinderella and the dance with Prince Charming.

Sweet nothings are exchanged between Cinderella and the prince on the dance floor, while Fairy Godmother looks on with an evil smirk.

Cleverly, the producer leaves the story open-ended, allowing for a follow-up. The question remains: do Cinderella and the prince ever hit it off? And what of the fearsome four? Are they nailed at last?