Keep your distance

There are four types of weapons: conventional (guns and normal bombs), nuclear, biological and chemical.

Nuclear, biological and chemical weapons fall under the designation of weapons of mass destruction.

The US government says it only possesses conventional and nuclear arsenals, and if it is attacked with chemical or biological weapons, it will retaliate with nuclear weapons.

Covid-19 is a virus. It has a lethality of 1-10%, right? That turns any person into a potential biological weapon.

That also happens to make any person who has a “challenge with social distancing” a potential attacker with a weapon of mass destruction.

What do you think the response should be when that 1m boundary is breached?

Every time I go shopping, I see at least a dozen acts of potentially lethal stupidity on the part of store employees and customers.

I get home drenched in sweat from the stress of the effort to avoid it all, and last week even had heatstroke due to dehydration.

As an educated former soldier and security professional, my understanding and compassion for dozy idiots has run out after five weeks of lockdown, since I know that mucous excretions can travel up to 3m and therefore the 1m “safe space” is utter nonsense, especially with the rags most people wear instead of proper surgical-grade masks.

Ladies and gentlemen, I plead with you. Be mindful of your surroundings at all times when you’re in public and keep your distance because my tolerance has run out.

If you do not, I will arrest you for attempted murder with a weapon of mass destruction and have you placed in some ugly government quarantine “facility”, after which I will do my utmost to ensure you tote soap on a rope for so many years that even the most crooked auditing firm will be able to honestly count your marbles by the time you’re released. Mircea Negres, Port Elizabeth