No need for red cards here
175 Helen Joseph Road, Glenwood Monday to Saturday 8am to 10pm, Sunday 8am to 3pm
031 201 4842
THWACK! – The ball hit the netting directly in front of us. The indoor soccer is in full swing as we sit on the verandah at Stella Sports Club enjoying a late afternoon GnT. It’s a good thing the netting is there or we’d be in the firing line – and the adjoining bar would have no windows left.
We involuntarily ducked as the chubby youngster took another strike – ka-bing, it hit the post this time.
We’re here because mother recommended the fish and chips – the best she had had, she said.
The menu is extensive and takes in most comforts and good pub grub staples; having not visited in ages, I’d remembered they were done well. Real food we no longer bother with at home type of grub.
Light bites take in the likes of chicken wings, chicken livers, prego rolls and a selection of spring rolls. There is also a selection of plates designed to soak up the booze at a bustling table like the one next door to us – with cheers as the chubby dude came tearing in again.
So you might want to share crumbed haloumi, meatballs, biltong, spring rolls and onion rings or BBQ ribs, cheesy sausages, chicken strips, chicken wings and onion rings. Yes, they love onion rings here. We opted to share their messy nachos (R95) with the addition of bacon bits (R20). These were every bit as messy as advertised, smothered in a home-made cheese sauce with cheese and crispy bacon bits, sour cream and avo and tomato salsa. Yes, good stuff.
The teams had changed and a gangly teen loped in for a header. Thwack – too high.
So besides a good selection of pizzas and pastas – included in a Tuesday special – mains could include rosemary chicken, steaks – either surf and turf or a good old steak egg and chips – ribs, and seafood. The calamari comes in a creamy garlic sauce, and there are a number of fish, prawn and calamari combos. I had to try the fish and chips with home-made tartar sauce (R98). It was as good as mother said it was – a generous piece of fish in light, crispy batter perfectly cooked, excellent chips and even a salad garnish. Full marks.
My friend wanted to try one of their famed burgers, which at 200g are sizeable. All burgers come with a meat, chicken or veg option. I’d had the Sharks burger with bacon feta and jalapenos that was piled high with onion rings previously – it was quite a meal.
But there’s also Philadelphia cheese and chilli
jam, or crumbled haloumi, bacon, hashbrown and chilli mayo. The Bok burger takes in biltong, bacon and garlic mayo. He opted for a beef burger topped with pulled pork rib and slaw (R115). It was massive, messy and delicious.
All mains come with a choice of chips, mash, rice, salad or vegetables – or even half-and-half. He opted for veg and I was impressed with the selection of roasted vegetables alongside properly cooked fresh spinach – none of these thick, tasteless sauces here. He couldn’t finish it all, and we remembered why we never ordered a starter here previously. Instead, he bagged it up for Scooby, the staffie cross, who’d get a treat at home.
Desserts – ice-cream and chocolate sauce, malva pudding or brownies – were out of the question. Instead we enjoyed a well-made Irish coffee as, thwack, the Italian livewire thumped another into the net. We blew the whistle on full time.
Food: 4
Service: 3½
Ambience: 3½
The Bill: R603 including three Irish coffees and some number of gins.