Staying single is the secret to a meaningful life, says researcher
LONDON: Being single allows people to “live their best, most authentic and most meaningful life” and the idea of wedded bliss is largely a myth, a psychologist has claimed.
Professor Bella DePaulo has told the American Psychological Association’s annual convention in Denver that she wanted to challenge the “conventional wisdom” that getting married helped people live longer, happier and healthier lives.
She had looked at 800 studies carried out in the past 30 years.
“Research comparing people who have stayed single with those who have stayed married shows single people have a heightened sense of self-determination and they are more likely to experience ‘a sense of continued growth and development’ as a person,” said DePaulo, of the University of California, Santa Barbara.
“Other research shows single people value meaningful work more than married people do. Another study of lifelong single people showed self-sufficiency serves them well: the more selfsufficient they were, the less likely they were to experience negative emotions.
“For married people, just the opposite was true.”
DePaulo, who described herself as “single, always have been, always will be”, said the reasons behind the relative popularity of unmarried life were “rarely acknowledged”.
“Increasing numbers of people are single because they want to be. Living single allows them to live their best, most authentic, and most meaningful life,” she said.
“Single people are more connected to parents, siblings, friends, neighbours, and co-workers than married people are; when people marry, they become more insular.
“The preoccupation with the perils of loneliness can obscure the profound benefits of solitude. It is time for a more accurate portrayal of single people and single life – one that recognises their strengths and resilience.”