Something up his sleeve
ASCORPION delayed take-off of a flight from Houston to Quito, Ecuador. It was spotted crawling out of the sleeve of a sleeping passenger. Then it was seen crawling under a seat, but was not seen again.
The airline had the passenger woken up and examined by medics to make sure he hadn’t been stung, according to Huffington Post.
Then, because the scorpion couldn’t be found, all passengers had to disembark. They were given meal vouchers while they waited for another plane to carry them. You don’t take any chances with scorpions.
The airline? Why, United, the same one that got into such hot water recently for roughly dragging a passenger off an overbooked flight. Attitudes seem to have changed.
But that scorpion can count itself lucky. The instinct toward unwanted passengers is possibly still there.
Announcements
STILL with the airline industry, some in-flight announcements come this way:
“Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants.”
On landing: “Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you’re going to leave anything, please make sure it’s something we’d like to have.”
“There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only four ways out of this airplane.”
“The weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we’ll try to have them fixed before we arrive.”
Jacob’s Ladder
SOME Durban history. A while ago we were discussing “Jacob’s Ladder” – that twisting, uphill stretch of Sarnia Road that relates to the account of Jacob’s Ladder in the Book of Genesis.
Now Clive Fryer, of Howick, says that is quite correct – people did name the road with Genesis in mind, but they did it more or less as a joke because the road led upwards from a hotel owned by a Mr Jacob.
Clive says JT Jacob arrived in Durban in the early days with his wife and sister. He was a blacksmith and locksmith but then switched to running a small tavern at the foot of Sarnia Hill, which he bought in partnership with a couple of friends.
This tavern, which apparently had accommodation as well, was the last refreshment point before the ox wagons began the long climb through Sea View, Malvern and Pinetown, then heading for the Transvaal and the Orange Free State.
It was built on the site of what was later to become the Outspan Hotel.
Jacob was a popular figure, according to Clive – who gets his information from a relative of the Jacob family – much given to consorting with his clientèle over a glass or two.
Came the era of the railroad and there was a Jacobs station at Clairwood.
All-rounder
DOES anyone know anything about a South African footballer named Gordon Hodgson, who caused a sensation playing for Liverpool in the 1920s?
Reader R Brooklyn says he’s just finished reading the official history of Liverpool Football Club.
Manager Matt McQueen was greatly impressed by Hodgson, who was in the Springbok team that toured Britain in 1925.
“McQueen persuaded him to remain in England where he could combine top-flight professional football with his other great passion, cricket.
“He stayed for 10 years as a centre-forward for Liverpool and fast bowler for Lancashire.
“Hodgson was a goalscoring legend, scoring 232 times in 359 appearances with 17 hat-tricks – still a record at Liverpool.
“After leaving Liverpool, he went on to rewrite the record books at Leeds, scoring 67 goals in 120 appearances, once scoring five goals in one match.”
But the official history doesn’t say what part of South Africa Hodgson came from. Can anyone out there help?
Tailpiece
RIDING the favourite at Greyville, a jockey is well ahead when suddenly he’s hit in the face by a sandwich and a pork pie. He manages to keep control but then he’s struck by a tin of caviar and a dozen Scotch eggs. He holds on grimly but, as the finish line approaches, he’s hit by a bottle of Chardonnay and a milk tart. He loses control for a moment and comes in second.
He complains to the stipendiary stewards: “I was seriously hampered.”
Last word
ART is like a border of flowers along the course of civilisation. – Lincoln Steffens