Is it curtains for this soapie?

THE Brexit fiasco possibly hurtles to a status of tragicomedy on Friday with a chaotic cliff-edge departure.

But will there be a last-minute twist to the script to keep the show going, as happens with all the best soapies?

So chaotic has the Brexit process been that when a group of protesters stripped their gear – boys and gals – in the public gallery of the House of Commons and glued themselves to the glass partition, it seemed almost a breath of normality.

These had nothing to do with Brexit. They were from Extinction Rebellion, a movement who protest at the lack of government action to prevent climate change. They got arrested and MPs were afforded the unusual sight of policemen peeling them from the glass partition, using liquid soap.

It was not lost on the MPs below, as the debate continued. Labour’s Peter Kyle adjusted his speech as the strippers appeared. “The naked truth is, Mr Speaker…” And when a colleague made a point of order: “I am grateful for the cheeky intervention…”

“He’s fleshing out his argument very well,” said Tory Justine Greening.

Ah yes, British humour in the moment of crisis.

But even this can’t compare for humour with Theresa May, the vicar’s daughter, getting lovey-dovey with Jeremy Corbyn, the Islington Marxist. Hilarious!

Will it all end on Friday? Or will the script be tweaked? This one could run and run.

Mozzies

A SCIENTIFIC study has found that electronic music can protect us from being bitten by mosquitoes.

An international panel of scientists played to a cluster of mosquitoes a track by an electronic artist calling himself Skrillex, who is known for a brand of music he calls “dubstep”, according to Sky News.

I confess I’d never heard until now of Skrillex or dubstep, but apparently they’re the answer when it comes to warding off the mozzies. A Skrillex number called

put them right off their chow, they barely touched the human guinea pigs that were available.

As the scientists put it in their precise way: “The occurrence of blood feeding activity was lower when music was being played.”

Er, yes. But are these scientists not being rather narrow in their investigations. Some people might prefer mosquitoes to Skrillex and the dubstep in the bedchamber. There’s always the insecticide cannister.

No Pepsi

A HAWAIIAN man has been ordered not to drink Pepsi Cola for the next four years while he serves probation for pinching a car.

Pepsi is apparently the favourite drink of 21-year-old Christopher Montilliano, jr. Judge Rhonda Loo made the ban on drinking it part of his probation sentence, which also included 100 hours of community service.

“It’s the Pepsi deprivation syndrome,” she said, according to Huffington Post.

How it’s enforced is surely another matter. Could Montilliano be hauled before the court again for driving under the influence of Pepsi?

A curious punishment but I dare say most of us would get through it okay. Castle or Famous Grouse would be a different matter – judicial barbarism, totally unacceptable in a civilised society.

Tailpiece

“FEEL like some slap and tickle?” “Your place or mine?”

“Well if you’re going to be argumentative, forget it.”

Last word

SOME are born great, some achieve greatness, and some hire public relations officers.