Those floods – makes ya think!
THE old mayor climb’d the belfry tower,
The ringers ran by two, by three; “Pull, if ye never pull’d before; Good ringers, pull your best,” quoth he.
“Play uppe, play uppe, O Boston bells!
Ply all your changes, all your swells, Play uppe, ‘The Brides of Enderby.’” It’s not often that our TV screens showing the astonishing and devastating flooding of Lincolnshire and other counties in England take us back to our school classrooms.
The above stanza starts A High Tide On The Coast of Lincolmshire, by Jean Ingelow, capturing the panic of the populace as the waters rise.
The poem laments the drowning of a girl who was milking cows at the riverside as the waters rose.
Fortunately, nothing of the kind appears to have happened this time.
However it’s interesting that Jean Ingelow, who wrote the poem in the 19th century, also drew on accounts of a 15th century flood, combining the two. Is this an attempted refutation of current climate change theories? It has been happening for hundreds of years?
Anything but. It merely shows that previously, Lincolnshire was flooded about once in 400 years. Does anyone believe we’ll have to wait another 400 years for another flooding of that county? Come on!
The odds have clearly been tipped against us, all over the world. Who did the tipping? We did, with the Industrial Age and all that has followed.
Sniffed by a shark
A FELLOW spent almost 24 hours in the sea off the coast of New Zealand and was rescued only after he used the reflection from his watch to signal for help, according to the BBC.
The unnamed man got into trouble when he fell overboard from his 12m boat while on a solo fishing trip.
He said a shark came to “have a sniff” of him at one point but eventually left him alone.
The angler was rescued by fishermen. He had attempted to swim to the Alderman Islands, about 55km off the east coast of the North Island, but was dragged away by the currents.
“He endured a cold night in the ocean, too exhausted to keep swimming,” police said.
The three fishermen who rescued him set out to investigate after spotting the reflection from his watch on the water.
He was taken to the nearby town of Whangamat – on the Coromandel Peninsula – where he was treated for hypothermia and exhaustion.
“It’s an absolute miracle this fisherman is still alive after that ordeal,” said police.
“Without the quick actions of the three fishermen who retrieved him, this certainly would have had a tragic outcome.”
Sniffed by a shark? It pays to be unappetising.
Tailpiece
A DEER asks a selfish beaver for help in stopping the flooding affecting her grazing grounds?
His reply: “Frankly, my deer, don’t give a dam.”
Last word
To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there’s no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. | Jack Handey