How to excel in a man’s world
Bic faced a public backlash as a result of its ‘Act like a lady. Think like a man’ Women’s Month message. The author of a new book says we do need to learn from men to get ahead in business. Omeshnie Naidoo reports
SOUTH-African women lag behind men in terms of pay and positions of power in business. Why? What is it that they are doing right and we are doing wrong?
In her book Play to Win, What Women Can Learn from Men in
Business, businesswoman and marketing specialist Donna Rachelson attempts to answer that.
She has held a number of marketing director positions in organisations such as Nando’s, the South African Institute of Chartered Accountants, as well as marketing management positions at Standard Bank South Africa and African Explosives and Chemicals Limited.
Rachelson makes a point we’d rather not hear, which is: it’s a man’s world. Men surely have a lot to learn from women – we’re emotionally intelligent, great at building relationships, compassionate and driven.
But to beat our counterparts we need to know what it is they’re doing to stay ahead of us.
This is not to say that you should act like a man, only that it helps to understand how they think and play the game.
Here are a few tips from the book:
BUSINESS IS A GAME
For men, business is a game. You need to treat it as one too. The basic play is that you strategise to make money. It’s like playing Monopoly. You’ve got to let it go – don’t take it all so seriously.
Business is about leveraging and assembling the right team and understanding the business model so that you can implement the strategy and make money. And then it becomes fun.
IT’S NOT PERSONAL
Women are judged on their personality, be it: “abrasive”, “judgmental” or “strident”, while men are judged on their competence. So while it may be true that women take criticism more personally – probably because we’re socialised to be people pleasers, and to keep the peace – we often bear the brunt of more personal criticism.
The trick is in identifying the difference between criticism of your work – genuine feedback on what you do – and criticism of who you are. Always deal with the behaviour (as it applies to work) rather than the person.
DON’T WAIT TO GET NOTICED
Rachelson says it’s important to walk the floor at work, and ensure people in the company know who you are and what you do. Don’t just restrict yourself to the few square metres your desk inhabits.
Introduce yourself to others, find out what they do, let them know what you’re about. Find ways to raise your visibility.
It can be hard to look at yourself and your achievements objectively. But there are ways of ensuring you get noticed. Update your boss on your progress. When there is a victory, be the first to announce it. Remember that being visible is half the battle. You can’t play if you can’t be seen.
DITCH THE SMALL, INCREMENTAL MOVES
Khanyi Dhlomo went from beauty editor to editor of South Africa’s True Love magazine when she was just 22. Within a year of her appointment, True Love’s circulation doubled from 70 000 to 140 000 and the magazine became the most widely read women’s magazine in the country.
If you’re not pushing the limits of your career comfort zone, you’re wasting opportunities.
FIND A SPONSOR – NOT A MENTOR
That means someone who will advocate for you, and it’s most likely to be a man.
“Men are a catalyst to our transformation. The individuals who contributed to my success were mostly men,” says Jo-Ann de Wet, operations director at McDonald’s, and one of the many South African businesswomen who share their opinion in the book. She says: “There are many men who serve as cheerleaders of women.”
According to the Harvard Business Review study called “The Sponsor Effect”, women in the upper echelons of business management who have a sponsor are at least 22 percent more likely to take risks such as asking for an assignment that will stretch them or asking for an increase.
ASSEMBLE YOUR TRIBE
Taking risks and giant leaps into the future is difficult. You will be assailed by self-doubt, and there will be external doubters, and there will be days when you think you can’t do what you have set out to do. But you can. Assemble a tribe of family and friends who will support you and cheer you on, and who have no doubts at all about your abilities. Those are the people who will help you to get where you want to go.
CONTINUE LEARNING
“If you stop learning you will become irrelevant, and that learning can take many different forms,” comments Fahmeeda Cassim-Surtee, sales director at DStv Media Sales. “It can be in the form of extra study. It can be in the form of extra skills, but most importantly for me, the learning can come from other people in the organisation.”
SPEAK UP
Women’s language is more tentative. A man will say: “I think we should do X to solve the problem.” A woman will say: “I’m not sure if this is the best solution, but maybe we should try X.”
Do you see the difference? We also use what linguists call tag questions: “The meeting is tomorrow, isn’t it?” or “That’s the way we should go, don’t you agree?” instead of just asking an outright question or making a firm statement.
Men are to the point and say what they need to say as forcefully as they think is necessary.
Trish Wilson, partner in charge of accounting and financial advisory at Deloitte & Touche, points out that women don’t just need to learn to speak up – they also need to learn to speak out. “It’s also about how quietly you speak – speak up! Don’t be apologetic. Say something. Be bold!” she advises.
WORK YOUR NETWORK
Women need to understand that it’s vital to have networks and trusted advisers who can introduce you to others in your field and help you to get a foot in the door. It really is about who you know, not what you know.
And once you have your foot in the door, thanks to a friend’s recommendation, it’s a lot easier to achieve your objectives.
BE UNCOMFORTABLE
Become comfortable with being uncomfortable: then you are growing. If you are comfortable, you are not being stretched. More importantly, though, you can’t function effectively when half your brain is offline, observing what you’re doing, and worrying and thinking about how others are responding to what you’re doing. You need to be focused on the job at hand.
FAKE IT TILL YOU ARE IT
Begin with the end in mind, and behave as if you have already achieved it.
“See the biggest picture,” says Monica Singer, the chief executive of Strate. “Surround yourself with the best people. When I first started in this business I didn’t know everything. But I see myself as the conductor of the orchestra. So I started learning – because the people who worked with me did know. Don’t get in the way, and learn what you need to learn.”
LOOK THE PART
Dress and behave like the savvy, smart and successful young professional you aim to be, starting today. Not only will it help others take you more seriously – more importantly, it will help you to take yourself more seriously.