An allegation of rape is not guilt
IT IS profoundly difficult to speak about the subject of rape, more especially as a man. But I’ll try to speak truthfully about the emotive subject.
Over the past two weeks I was traumatised by various personal stories of horrific rape ordeals women allegedly suffered at the hands of men.
Many women used various media to expose their sexual assaults. Some of the men referred to are public figures while others are less well known.
Reading the accounts, I felt traumatised – as though I’d raped a woman.
Among the women was singer and former ANC MP Jennifer Ferguson who alleged that Danny Jordaan, the South African Football Association (Safa) president, raped her in a Port Elizabeth hotel room.
Ferguson said: “I accepted his invitation to join him for a drink at the bar, but said I needed to go up to my suite and change from my performance dress. He joined me in the lift and said he would wait for me. I felt a little uneasy as he entered my suite, but beckoned him into the lounge and asked him to wait there while I changed.”
Following a public outcry regarding his silence on the matter, the Safa boss caved in, and rejected the allegation through a statement put out by his legal representative on November 1.
I do not wish to go into the merits or demerits of the statement Jordan’s lawyers issued, except to say that if I were accused of such a serious crime like rape, I would’ve promptly repudiated the allegations – that’s if I didn’t commit the offence.
However, I can’t judge the Safa boss on the basis of his prolonged silence amid such a serious claim like rape.
When the allegation surfaced, Ntsiki Mazwai, a poet, called for the soccer boss to be summarily dismissed.
While Kwaito star, Sipho Ndlovu, popularly known as Brickz, was being sentenced, Mazwai alleged on her Twitter account that she had been raped by the Kwaito star.
For the record, Brickz was sentenced to 15 years in prison after being found guilty of raping a then 17-year-old relative in 2013 so it is safe to refer to him as a rapist.
Though I’m greatly empathetic towards people who were raped, should we condemn people who have been accused of raping women as “rapists” before such a serious allegation is robustly tested in a court of law?
Why should men, who refuse to prejudge others accused of being rapists, be deemed misogynists?
Does society or women expect men to simply suspend their thinking or lived experiences of being falsely accused, and go ahead and call other men, who have been accused of rape, rapists in order to demonstrate empathy?
I’m the last person who needs to be reminded about sexual crimes men commit against women.
Recently, police released the 2016/2017 crime stats and while the figures demonstrate a 4.3% decline in the number of sexual offences, there’s nothing to celebrate as there shouldn’t be any woman being sexually violated in the first place.
Our society possesses empirical evidence of numerous men whom women have falsely accused of rape. We are aware of men being the victims of false rape accusations, so should we therefore ignore the reality and condemn men as sexual predators on account that a woman “claims” to be a rape survivor?
Let’s perhaps personalise rape by asking: Would those who demand that we regard rape allegations as the gospel truth allow society to also call those with whom we are intimately involved rapists based on a woman’s singular account of rape? Tomorrow, it could be your father, husband, uncle, brother and son who is falsely accused.
In matters as emotive as these ones, we should all allow competent institutions such as the courts to give us permission to call those accused of rape rapists – and only after a thorough judicial process culminating in a conviction. For instance, as I mentioned, we can safely call Brickz a rapist as a court of law, and not public opinion, processed the matter legally and brought everything to finality. Pretoria East
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