A WORLD CUP
SOMETIMES – okay, quite often – organisations put out press releases which make us go “Huh”. Many are pointless, like this week’s announcement from the International Cricket Council. “The ICC today announced that it has renamed the ICC World T20 as the ICC T20 World Cup. This means next editions of the events in 2020 in Australia will be known as the ICC Women’s T20 World Cup 2020 and the ICC Men’s T20 World Cup 2020.” Well, phew, glad they did that right, how would we all have coped?
THIS IS TSHWANE!
IF YOU’VE not seen it yet, the Tshwane Spartans have an advert out that is well...pretty awful. There’s a bloke in cricket gear who keeps getting kicked – or something. Apparently it has something to do with the movie 300. And no, Injury Time hasn’t watched it either. It stars the mayor of Tshwane Solly Msimanga, Pierre Spies, some shirtless Afrikaans singer badly in need of a tan, a burly drag-queen, Dean Elgar and Spartans assistant coach Mandla Mashimbyi. Check it out on the Spartans’ twitter feed @SpartansMSLT20. We don’t think you’ll thank us.
FROM the weird apology/explanation from former Manchester United left-back Patrice Evra about that chicken video: One day after posting possibly the strangest video any of us had seen in a while, Patrice Evra is back... The former Manchester United and West Ham defender, 37, filmed himself kissing, caressing and spanking a RAW chicken to “celebrate” Thanksgiving, the national holiday in the United States. It provoked a huge reaction from people on social media, many of whom were disgusted and a little bit disturbed by his over-sensual admiration for the raw poultry. Well, Evra has now posted an apology for his actions saying, in his own words, it was “a little bit nasty nasty”. “Some people found it funny, some people found it weird, some people found it disgusting – we are all different, thank god!” he continued. “Yeah. OK, I went too far when I, [sucks thumb suggestively], when I sucked the toes of the chicken.” The Frenchman says people online have “wished” he contracted salmonella – a type of food poisoning that causes diarrhoea, fever, vomiting, and abdominal cramps.
ZLATAN Ibrahimovic on what he has hanging on his wall at home: “My wife does not allow me to have pictures of myself. She says, ‘There is already enough talk of you and I don’t want to see you on the walls, it is enough that I see you in real life’. “There is one of my feet on the wall. That is what has given us what we have, it is a reminder for the family, not for me, of what we have. That is what has created the whole situation, the whole buzz around me – the two feet. I play this beautiful sport with my feet. Even if it is ugly toes, we don’t care – we put it on the wall just as a reminder, we have food to eat thanks to those feet so you should kiss those feet every day – no, I’m joking. Every footballer’s toes and feet around the world are ugly – there is no beautiful out there.” Right
MONEY TALKS (SORT OF)
ITALY’S RUGBY coach Conor O’Shea was not happy with the referee against the Wallabies. “You have to be very careful in choosing your words because my wife would be pretty annoyed if I got fined, and we don’t have that sort of money leading up to Christmas.”
WE DIDN’T give a damn about the “Tiger v Phil” golf one-on-one thing that played out in Las Vegas on Friday. Two blokes worth over $2 billion dollars playing in a pay-per-view (nogal) “match” for a $9 million pot seemed obscene. And we’re glad we didn’t watch it. “You know, America, you’re watching some really crappy golf,” Charles Barkley, a former basketball star who was commentating on ‘The Match’ said about half an hour into ‘The match’. That about sums the whole thing up, really.