HOW WE GOT OVER OUR BEDROOM INHIBITIONS
*Disclaimer: Not for the sensitive and sexually-shy!
SPHUMELELE MALUNGA, 28, MEDICAL STUDENT
“I’d rush foreplay so I could hide my mkhaba (pot belly) and get on with the deed. I’d be stressed, dry and uncomfortable, and not enjoy sex at all. My boyfriend was sympathetic to my insecurities and prioritised my needs and how I like it. I learnt to embrace my belly, to communicate openly and take the lead in our sex life by googling new positions. Now we have an amazing sex life!”
SINDISWA PORTIA MANDOYI,
28, BUSINESS CONSULTANT
“I was embarrassed by my small breasts, back acne and the lump on my back. I feared doggy style because it gave a full view of my imperfect back. Over time, I learned my bum was one of my greatest assets. As my confidence increased, doggy style allowed me to be in control. I guided his hands to where I want him to touch. By embracing the traits I couldn’t change in my body, my sex life improved.”
NOMPUMELELO MAGAYANA, 31, FASHION BLOGGER AND FOUNDER OF “DEAR CLOSET”
“When I left my husband after eight years, I fell for a younger man. I was a mom with a big tummy, large breasts and stretch marks. In the beginning our sex was lacklustre, and I was always anxious despite his constant reassurances. I started embracing my imperfections and bought sexy lingerie to boost my confidence and spice things up. That really drove him wild!”
TIISETSO PRISCILLA JAKANE, 22, TRAINEE WATER AGENT
“Being a chubby girl with cellulite, I refused to be naked in front of my partner and I would only have sex with the lights off. Seeing how uncomfortable I was, my partner spoke to me about my insecurities, and he reassured me of his love and appreciation for my body. As my anxiety stopped and my self-esteem developed, I was open to trying out new positions and to spice up our sex life. It’s so much fun now!”
MITCHELL RASUTHU, 28, IT SPECIALIST
“I have what I call ‘heavy boobs’. I wouldn’t dare take off my bra during sex, until my boyfriend asked why I was denying him access to my breasts. He loved my boobs and was astonished to learn that I hated them. My attitude has since changed, and I now allow him to massage them and also fulfill his sexual fantasies on them. Our sex life is phenomenal, and I can’t believe that I once let my insecurity rob me of so much fun in bed.”