FROM THE GLASS CEILING TO THE GLASS CLIFF

Joining a new organisation in a demanding season can be an opportunity to showcase your skills, and be part of a team that brings about positive change. Other times though, starting a new job when a company is going through a turbulent time can make even ordinary work responsibilities seem formidable. Sometimes, what seems like a wonderful opportunity to climb up the corporate ladder is actually an ascent that leads you to the top, and pushes you over.

When such a situation occurs, specifically involving a woman being called in to “save the day” at a time of crisis, it’s called a glass cliff. This is what some say happened to Nhlamu Dlomu, who was appointed CEO of KPMG South Africa in May 2017. The firm was in the midst of scandals that saw it lose contracts with major clients. In an attempt to repair its image, the entire leadership team was replaced. For the first time in its history, KPMG had a black female CEO – this during one of the worst times the organisation had ever faced.

Having been promoted from within the company, Dlomu was touted as being well-suited to the job. During her tenure at the helm, KPMG admitted its mistakes and pledged to repay fees earned from questionable dealings. Dlomu was the face and voice of this tarnished company. By November 2018, when the worst of the scandal seemed to have died down, she stepped down from her position. A new black male leader was appointed while she was moved to another job within the company. Her experience fits the classic description of a glass cliff appointment.

STAY STILL OR KEEP MOVING

According to Mosima Selekisho, a director at executive search and talent management company, Signium Africa, the glass cliff is a phenomenon where women are elevated to positions of power when things are going poorly and therefore, have a higher likelihood of failure. This means there’s a greater risk for them to fall.

Dlomu’s scenario may seem rare because of her position as CEO, but

the glass cliff is actually quite prevalent in South Africa, Selekisho says.

“We do have cases where female executives were promoted to positions of power during times of crisis. Most didn’t make it in those roles, which is unfortunate because this automatically adds to statistics of women who failed in top positions.”

However, it’s not only women at the top who experience the glass cliff; it happens at all career levels. It really takes courage, resilience and vulnerability to step up to a risky role. So, if you’ve been offered a job in which the deliverables don’t seem achievable, you need to carefully consider your next step. You may feel like there’s only two options on the table – accept or decline.

Maiyo Febi, MD of boutique change-management consultancy Native Worx, advises that you have some strategic conversations before making a decision. “Firstly, discuss the deliverables with the company before declining. You may be shedding light on something that it was not aware of; companies are generally negotiable on their terms and conditions. Treat it as an opportunity to share and demonstrate your know-how.”

Febi suggests finding a well-performing similar role in the marketplace. Then, propose the deliverables associated with that position as a way to demonstrate the likelihood of success. “One of the ways we learn is through other people’s experiences, as well as trusting yourself and your perspective. Your view is just as valid as the company’s, and you are the expert of the role, hence the offer.”

This approach means you can have assurance that you have explored all avenues. You will then likely have closure on the matter should the company not budge, and you decide to decline. “At this stage, it will be apparent to the company that you have declined due to unfruitful negotiations. As we advance in our careers, hard conversations become a doorway to our progress, and we shouldn’t shy away; negotiation skills, tact and maturity are a must.”

When it’s time for the conversation to decline, Selekisho advises that you keep your reasons generic. It may be tempting to point out all the flaws in how the position is structured, how the deliverables aren’t realistic or that you think the company’s image can’t be repaired. Don’t get into specifics. “Rather give a generic reason when declining the offer as you don’t want to burn your bridges. This is because the people you interact with might also be sitting on boards or interview panels of other companies you might be interested in joining.”

MOVING ONWARDS AND UPWARDS

Deciding to take on a difficult position doesn’t necessarily mean that you are headed straight for a perilous glass cliff. It is possible to advance in your career, and not face a risky jump when you get to the next higher phase.

Three factors are critical to success if you take on a role that is high pressured, and requires high performance. Career coach and CEO of Hesed Consulting Vumile Msweli says these are sufficient time, clearly defined success factors as well as a supporting environment and team.

“In my observation, the common reason most senior female executives fall over the glass cliff, is time. To change the direction of any large organisation takes time. It is important that women leaders negotiate a sufficient period to be able to turn the ship around before taking on the role,” Msweli explains.

It is also important to know what sort of support structures you will require in order to deliver your best work. Women have different circumstances, and so require different systems and types of support, so don’t be afraid to put forward what would work best for you. Once you’ve identified the best and necessary case scenario, you have to communicate your needs.

You can’t know what the company would consider if you don’t ask. But then, you do need to be very specific about what you’re asking for, Febi says. “For instance, asking your manager to be more supportive is open-ended. However, asking your line manager to meet with you every other day for 30 minutes to go through stressful critical projects, and requesting leave for the last Friday afternoon of the month so you can spend time with your mentor, is asking for clear support. Frame your request in a way that illustrates the value that the organisation will get.”

This way, you stand a chance of succeeding in your role without paying a personal cost such as burnout or damaged personal relationships. You also stand a chance of continued growth, and promotions that mean you will reach the cliff, but not fall off.

The fact that some women earn more than their partners really shouldn’t still be a shocker in 2020. But alas, we still live in times where men who earn less than their better halves choose to be emasculated by something as fickle as money. Many times, a woman will fall so deeply in love that they will not be deterred by their partner not being able to contribute equally to money matters. But, when it comes to other aspects of their relationship, they work equally towards making it great.

Software engineer Refilwe Motho*, 32, has been with her boyfriend for three years. “I earn triple what he makes plus benefits. At the beginning of our relationship, we used to split the bill. As we became more serious, I would pick up the whole bill or be more generous with the gifts and holiday accommodations,” Motho says. “Sometimes, he would insist on paying, but I enjoyed taking care of the financial aspect of our dating activities because I really liked him. When we started discussing moving in together, we exchanged our salary information. Although that didn’t change the dynamics, it opened up a dialogue about how he wished he made more so that he could be in a better position financially. But, it didn’t bother me that he couldn’t,” she recalls.

As things got serious, Motho and her boyfriend went on to meet each other’s friends and family — and of course some pressing questions were put on the table. “What does he drive; where does he live; what does he do for a living ? And, will he be able to take care of you? My love-struck heart would be caught off-guard by sarcastic responses from friends every time I shared that I made enough to take care of the both of us,” she says.

The day Motho’s father enquired about her boyfriend frazzled her even more — especially when he refused to give his blessing for her to be with someone who could not provide for her.

It goes without saying that ageold patriarchal systems continue to influence masculinity in many societies and cultures. These often position men as the heads of households because they, initially, held the right to work and bring home the money. This, in turn, has conditioned many women to hold a man’s financial status to high esteem when considering a relationship, says counselling psychologist and life coach Linda Maye. Opinions around who earns more, and who it should actually be, are abound. With the legacy of men being providers, many people use financial class to determine their worth. Very often, they believe that the higher a man’s financial class, the worthier he makes them look, adds psychologist and relationship expert Makabelo Motaung.

“For me, modern-day thought paradigms and shifting perspectives around women being given the same economic regard as men means that providence is dynamic, and often specific to context and personal desires,” Motho expresses. “With all this range to relationships, I’ve been comfortable with the reality of dating someone who earns less. Unfortunately, because we don’t exist in silos, at some point my father’s comment and those of my friends started making me overthink the financial dynamic of my relationship,” she adds.

goodness and deep-sigh the bad vibes; you’re going to be just fine. She explains that the journey begins with what your voice is telling you. Both your internal voice and capacity to express yourself are important to nurture. When you’re able to confidently express yourself, you’re more likely to be able to stand up to people trying to shame you. But, if you don’t have a say, it silences you and makes you carry shame – first within yourself and then on behalf of others. “My experience with clients has taught me that many people lack selfvalidation. And, when you haven’t developed it, people can easily invalidate you with their remarks,” Dr Zwane says. The different dynamics introduced by friends or family matter because we often don’t define what things mean for ourselves and our partners. So, we lend over to relative norms to formulate our perceptions. She adds that lacking an understanding of the value of your relationship also makes you susceptible to being easily influenced. “Once you’ve done the internal work, you can establish rules of engagement with your partner, like whether or not to shield them when questions about what they do for a living come up.”

So, what makes a relationship tick? Dr Zwane draws from a concept called the Triangle of Love, that works with three components – passion, commitment and intimacy – as the working formula for a good relationship. She adds that it’s great when you can achieve all three, but long-term relationships can still function on any two. Intimacy is by far the most valuable aspect. “And no, we’re not talking about sexual intimacy – we’re talking about getting personal and closely acquainted with your partner.” Understanding your love languages, values and belief systems is imperative.

And, avoiding assumptions based on how you interpret each other enables you to love each other based on your true selves.

All relationships are prone to challenges, and it’s important to pay attention to your partner’s actions to observe how they make you feel, Maye says. Our preferences may vary, but our instincts give us the clues we need. When you don’t like something, say it. If it is repeated, decide whether you can tolerate it or not. Keep an eye out for restrictive behaviour, gaslighting or narcissism, Dr Zwane adds. Ask yourself whether the financial dynamic comes with offish demands of shrinking yourself so that your partner can feel more masculine. If they want you to shrink yourself, they value their beliefs more than you.

*Not their real name