SO STRONG, SO FIERCE, SO FINE!
In celebration of Women’s Month these four inspirational South African women tell their stories of adversity, triumph and hope
THEY’RE heroes to millions of South Africans, these women who’ve made their mark, forcing everyone to sit up and take notice of them. But don’t be fooled. Sophie Ndaba, Thuli Madonsela, Tumi Morake and Lindiwe Hani may be household names but success didn’t just fall into their laps.
Getting locked up by the apartheid security police, battling drug addiction, being kicked out of university, and having to learn how to cope as a single parent – these women faced their own major challenges along the way.
In celebration of Women’s Month, we pay tribute to four movers and shakers whose unshakeable self-belief helped them to move mountains.
SOPHIE NDABA THE SINGLE MOM
She’s best known for her long-standing role as Queen Moroka in SABC1 soapie Generations, but it’s her roles as a mother and businesswoman that are the greatest source of pride for Sophie Ndaba (45). For her it’s all been about learning to strike a balance.
“The biggest challenge I’ve had to endure through the years is being a single mother and trying to build a career and a business at the same time.”
Sophie insists there’s no recipe for being a successful businesswoman as well as a good mom. “The best is to treat everything like an important project. As businesspeople, we tend to treat our businesses in a professional manner but when it comes to our private lives we fail to make our children a priority.”
Her children – Shallon (29), Rudo (25) and Lwandle (18) – attended boarding school but when they were home for the holidays she made sure they had her full attention.
“I made many sacrifices in order for my children to have what they needed. Today, they’ve grown to be independent and selfsufficient.”
And they’re bound to draw plenty of inspiration from watching their mom.
It took lots of blood, sweat and tears but Sophie finally succeeded in making her mark in the male-dominated events industry. Starting as a wedding planner, she built up to where she now stands poised to become one of the biggest festival organisers in Africa.
“I’m proud that I’ve taken that scary leap of faith. As a black woman in the events industry it’s tough, but I told myself that I can do it. I have the right support around me, a great team, and I’m also learning from the people who’ve been there before me.”
TUMI MORAKE THE FUNNYWOMAN
In 2003 Tumi Morake found herself at a crossroads after being kicked out of Wits University and being unable to finish her BA degree in dramatic arts. “My mom had a mental breakdown and couldn’t afford to pay my fees anymore,” she says. “I had to decide whether to quit university and go back home or whether to stay in Johannesburg and make a life for myself. I decided to stay and fight.”
And she reckons this is why she is where she is today. Even though she had to take time off from varsity to work and raise the cash, she was determined to finish what she’d started. “I went back to school and studied with kids half my age but I didn’t forget my dreams,” she says.
It eventually took her seven years to complete her degree but she reckons it was worth it. “A lot of women find themselves in awkward positions and see no way out. It’s all about how you react in the bad times. You need to have a positive outlook and believe you can overcome any situation.”
Today Tumi (35) – who’s mom to Bonsu (8), Lesedi (5) and Althea (3) – is an award-winning comedian and host of Jacaranda FM’s breakfast show and TV talk show #WTFTumi.
Last year she spoke out about her childhood trauma, revealing that she’d been raped at age six. “I lived in shame most of my life for something that wasn’t my fault.”
Tumi wants women to have a voice and share their stories of abuse, as well as stories of victory. “I was afraid of how people would look at me and what they’d think. But I want to tell other women not to be silenced by the space that you’re in. Don’t be quiet.”
THULI MADONSELA THE FREEDOM FIGHTER
As a child growing up in Soweto, Thuli was awkward and anxious and was often picked on by her peers. But all this would stand her in good stead – it taught her how to stand up to bullies, so she was well equipped for her showdowns with security police in the ’80s as a member of the anti-apartheid struggle.
“I’ve always found myself involved in fighting for the underdog as early as I found myself equipped with knowledge about law and social justice,” she told 702 and Cape Talk’s Redi Tlhabi in a candid interview last year.
During the apartheid years she was detained without trial at Diepkloof prison and Thuli (54) is remembered by her fellow inmates as “a comforting presence, not easily disturbed by isolation and psychological pain”, her biographer Thandeka Gqubule writes in the newly released book No Longer Whispering to Power.
In 1990 Thuli obtained her LLB degree and began her steady climb to the top of the legal ladder. When she became public protector in 2009 – the first woman to be appointed to the high-profile role – many suspected President Jacob Zuma had picked her because he thought she was a lightweight who’d go easy on him. If this was the case, he was in for a nasty surprise.
During her seven-year tenure not even the highest office in the land was exempt from her scrutiny.
She persisted, despite her investigations often prompting insults, criticism and even death threats.
She’s currently serving a one-year fellowship at Harvard University in America.
LINDIWE HANI THE SURVIVOR
She’s battled drug addiction and the trauma of losing her father at a young age, but the daughter of slain South African Communist Party leader Chris Hani says being a woman and mother has helped her get through it all.
“My healing was brought about because I’m a woman. I didn’t want to raise my daughter, Khaya, in the bottomless pit that is living with an addict and I didn’t want her to fall into the same trap. I wanted to stop the cycle,” says the author of Being Chris Hani’s Daughter.
But Lindiwe (36) concedes she’s still working through her challenges. “I don’t believe I’ll completely overcome my addictions. I’ll consistently and constantly have to be vigilant. I’m so incredibly grateful for the 12-step [addiction recovery] programme as it forces me to check in with how I’m feeling, which is something I think a lot of us neglect as we navigate through our lives.”
The best advice she’s received was to “never be afraid to ask for help because one doesn’t have to go through hardship alone”. She also encourages people not to fear failure, because it’s how we get back up that’s important.
Lindiwe lists her greatest achievements as giving birth to Khaya (now 12), her recovery from drugs and finally feeling proud to be her father’s daughter. “I’m constantly amazed that anybody thinks of me as a role model. As for being a woman and mother, currently I couldn’t be prouder of myself. I know that I’m living my truth and that takes so much pressure off me. Society doesn’t make it easy to be a woman but I can only do my best and pray that’s enough.”