Remembering Covid nurse one year on
A year after her death, the family of nurse Petronella Benjamin tell us about life without her
THEY’VE spent the past few months trying to pick up the pieces of their lives, but this month has opened raw wounds for the Benjamin family. March marks a year since the deadly outbreak of Covid-19 hit SA – and so far, more than 1,5 million people have been infected and 50 600 have died.
Petronella Benjamin from Eerste River near Cape Town was at the forefront of the pandemic as one the many brave frontline workers who risked their lives daily.
But her life ended abruptly when she succumbed to the disease she’d worked so hard to shield her patients against.
Petronella passed away on 29 April – a day before she was set to retire. Nurse Nellie, as she was affectionally known, was also the first nurse in the Western Cape lost to the dreaded virus.
Nearly a year after her death, the Benjamin family is still trying to come to terms with their beloved mother and grandmother’s untimely death.
“It feels so unreal,” says Nellie’s daughter, Alicia Maart (45). “It feels like I’m going to wake up tomorrow morning and she’ll be here.
“Our mom went to the hospital to get better but she didn’t come back. Everything was so cold – we had to arrange her funeral in three days, and we couldn’t even have a proper funeral,” she says.
The past year has been hell for their family. “We’re all struggling,” she tells YOU. “We didn’t only lose my mom to Covid, but my grandmother also died from the virus in August last year.”
When her younger brother, Marvin, landed in hospital in December for 10 days after testing positive for the virus, “it felt like my family was reliving the nightmare all over again,” she says.
Covid- 19 infections are steadily decreasing and the country has come through the second wave. But Alicia, who works as a nurse, is still worried about the future and the threat of a third wave.
Knowing the virus has robbed their family of so much has made them all anxious. Covid-19, Alicia says, isn’t going anywhere yet.
BEFORE she contracted the virus, Nellie, who worked at the Cape Town Reproductive Clinic, was booked off sick for a week. She’d contracted bronchitis, which left her immune
system vulnerable. It wasn’t long before the opportunistic virus struck and Nellie started showing Covid-19 symptoms.
“She called me one Wednesday morning and said she’s not feeling well. She’d started to throw up,” Alicia recalls.
Nellie tested positive for Covid-19 and was admitted to the intensive care unit at N1 City’s Netcare Hospital. The 61-year-old was relatively healthy – she took medication for hypertension – but her condition quickly worsened as the virus took hold.
“She was very afraid because she knew she had the virus. Her breathing started getting weaker and her oxygen levels dropped.”
Despite being gravely ill in hospital, Nellie was concerned about her husband, Edwin (also 61). Edwin had several comorbidities, including diabetes, and Nellie worried that he’d contract the killer virus.
“She asked us to please make sure my dad was being taken care of.”
The Benjamin family rallied behind their mom, praying fervently for Nellie’s recovery.
When her condition continued to deteriorate, doctors called the family to say their final goodbyes.
The family, however, couldn’t see her face as Nellie was on a ventilator and turned on her stomach to facilitate oxygen flow to her lungs.
A few hours after they’d said their goodbyes, Alicia received the call they’d dreaded.
There was more bad news for the family. “The same day my mom passed, my dad tested positive for Covid-19. We forced him to go to hospital because he looked worse than my mom did when she was admitted.”
Fortunately Edwin, who was married to Petronella for 33 years, has since made a full recovery.
But it’s bittersweet as he and Nellie had looked forward to her retirement so they could spend their golden years together, free of stress.
Had Nellie listened to her family’s pleas to retire in December 2019, she may still be around, Alicia says.
“But she told us she also has a ‘work family’ to take care of.
“She wasn’t ready to retire.”
NELLIE’S death was also a blow to the community she served.
“After her death, so many of her patients messaged to tell me positive stories about my mom and how she’d treat them at the clinic,” Alicia says. “She was a nurse but also a counsellor.” Alicia was booked off from work for five months as she tried to process her loss. Though she’s in better spirits, her mother’s death has left a gaping hole in her life, along with those of her brothers, Teneano, Marvin and O’Neil.
At times, Alicia says, she and her siblings were jealous of their own kids as “Ouma Nellie” would shower her nine grandchildren with gifts.
“My mom lived for her grandchildren. She gave them the best and spoiled them so much,” she says.
Nellie, who was also a pastor, was her daughter’s best friend. Alicia could talk to her mom about anything but now she must stop herself in her tracks when she wants to dial her mom’s number. “I miss her every day,” she says.
“Everyone loved her. She took a lot of people’s secrets to the grave because they’d confide in her. I think that was what she loved most about her job – she was able to communicate and counsel her patients. I’ve learnt a lot from her about how to practise nursing.”
Alicia, who has been a nurse for 21 years, recently went for her Covid-19 vaccine. “I didn’t have any side effects and I feel safer now,” she says. “If you can get the vaccine, take it.” Alicia says the Benjamins are doing their best to continue their mom’s legacy and keep the family together. Recently, they celebrated when her brother O’Neil purchased property.
Nellie was excited when her son told her he planned to buy a house and had offered to hang his curtains and decorate the place if the deal went through.
“Now we miss her with every achievement,” Alicia says.
“But we get together once or twice a month to spend some time and talk about her – that’s just the way my mom raised us.”
‘She asked us to make sure my dad was being taken care of’