MY MUNDANE LIFE IS GETTING ME DOWN

I’m 45, divorced and long for a partner. I’ve been single for five years and each year I hope this will be the year in which I meet my soulmate, only to get to the end of another year while still being on my own.

I’m a receptionist but don’t really meet a lot of new people. I live alone in a flat in a complex and everyone here is busy with their own lives.

I’ve tried to make friends in the complex but it wasn’t easy with the pandemic because nobody wanted to meet new people or go out for dinner.

I’m extremely lonely and find myself becoming more and more depressed because of my mundane life.

I simply go to work, come back, eat, sleep and go to work again. Weekends are torture as I find myself alone with nowhere to go. What should I do? Betsy, email

You need to take a long, hard look at your lifestyle and make some changes. You can’t expect to meet your soulmate or make new friends if you spend the entire weekend in your flat.

What are your interests? Whether it’s books, birdwatching, hiking or cooking, find out if there are clubs or activities in your area that you can get involved in. The internet can be a wonderful resource, so use it to get organised and plan some things.

Then get out there and attend club meetings or go on outings, not with the intention of meeting a romantic partner but simply to have fun, meet new people and make new friends.

Rather make that your focus because if you give the impression that you’re desperate to have a relationship it can frighten men off.

If you’re not keen to join a club or go on outings, consider volunteering at a children’s home or an animal shelter. You’ll be surprised how rewarding this can be.

The bottom line is if you really want things to change you need to get out there – out of your flat – and start living again. Once you step out of your routine you’ll make new friends so your life can be richer and more fulfilling.