MY HUSBAND WON’T SEE THE TRUTH

I’m desperate because my husband told me he’s fallen in love with his secretary. He wants to divorce me so he can marry her. She’s 20 years younger than him and he obviously finds this very exciting.

I know his secretary as she’s been working for him for six years. I think she’s a gold-digger because we’re well-off. I’ve heard a rumour she has a lover on the side, but my husband doesn’t want to hear about this.

I suggested we go for counselling but he says he no longer loves me and doesn’t think our marriage can be saved because his love for me died years ago. He’s determined to move forward with this woman.

I know that if he destroys our marriage now he’s going to regret it one day. Luckily our children are adults and won’t be too affected by this – although they think he’s lost his marbles. What do I do? Marinda, email

If a relationship is to be saved, the will to work on it must come from both parties. Unfortunately, it sounds as if you’re the only one willing to work on it. If your husband is adamant he no longer loves you and wants out, you’ll have to accept it, even if you think he’s making a huge mistake.

The best thing you can do is get yourself an experienced divorce attorney who can make sure your assets are fairly divided and that you’re financially protected. You must listen to your attorney’s advice, even if what they suggest makes you feel sorry for your husband.

It’s time to look after your own wellbeing and let your husband live with the consequences of his decisions.