My word, my way

As children grow, they’re exposed to the world outside of themselves and are busy learning about how things work, says Sheryl Cohen, an educational psychologist.

She explains: “To make sense of this world, they tend to apply rigid rules about the outside world – which they then stick to religiously. If you always put on Joshua’s right shoe first, then he’ll expect you to do it that way always, and if you don’t, you might be faced with a temper tantrum. This is not because he’s developing obsessive compulsive disorder – it’s because he’s trying to establish rules for himself about how the world works. So many behaviours that seem inexplicable are just a reflection of the rigid cognitive structure that toddlers have. This is normal – even if toddlers’ assumptions are wrong. Once these ‘rules’ are established, toddlers are more open to experiencing ‘exceptions to the rule’. The process of maturity and cognitive growth will sort this out.”