INTIMACY in the 3 stages of pregnancy

• TRIMESTER 1 (CONCEPTION TO 12 WEEKS)

The first trimester is often physically exhausting for you, as you may experience nausea, vomiting, fatigue and sensitive breasts – all of which may lead to decreased sexual desire. But this doesn’t have to mean the end of intimacy. “As sex is often an important expression of your intimate relationship, this time can be difficult for you and your partner to feel connected to each other,” says counselling psychologist Claire Hart. She says that feelings can be achieved through new expressions of intimacy, such as caressing, massages and touch.

• TRIMESTER 2

(12 TO 32 WEEKS)

This is usually an exciting time in the pregnancy, with the baby making its presence felt. Although sexual intimacy is often rekindled, the feeling that you’re having sex with a third person present can lead to decreased sexual frequency.

And Claire warns, “Once the reality sets in that you and your partner are having a baby, the stresses of expecting and raising a child can become emphasised. This can be a difficult and conflicted time in your relationship, as you and your partner make decisions about work, identity and responsibilities related to your child.” This can be the optimal opportunity to seek out counselling and learn new ways of interacting with each other.

• TRIMESTER 3

(32 WEEKS TO BIRTH)

During this phase, you may experience many doubts and uncertainties about the baby and the upcoming birth. “These normal anxieties, as well as pelvic changes, may lead to fluctuations in your sexual desire. There are often periods of intense sexual activity, followed by periods of tranquillity, refocusing on the baby and getting ready for the impending birth,” Claire says. Coping with these changes is important for you and your partner’s wellbeing and continued experience of being a parenting team.