And so, your child learns

1 HONESTY

“One should make it easy and rewarding for a child to tell the truth,” Hettie says. Set a rule that when your child comes to you voluntarily to report damage, a mess or something she has lost, there will be no punishment, just repair. But, if she is caught telling a lie, punishment will be meted out.

Hettie says that children should personally experience the fact that the truth sets them free, otherwise they learn to use lies as the path of least resistance.

2 RESPONSIBILITY

“A sense of responsibility develops in stages; 2-year-olds can already help with little chores but definitely can’t remember to do them without being reminded and helped. We must have realistic expectations,” Hettie says. The secrets to instilling this are: start early, avoid putting too much pressure on your child, reward enthusiasm and persevere.

3 RESPECT FOR OTHERS AND FOR THE SELF

Respect is a value that is inculcated through the example of parents. Our boundaries become the norm to our children. Teach your toddler to knock before entering or ask before taking something. These boundaries are the foundation for respect and self-respect. In this way you teach your child to be able to say “yes” and “no” regarding her time and belongings. Children who do not hear “no” will not know how to handle it later in their lives.

4 CONCERN FOR OTHERS

There are thousands of practical ways to experience kindhearted charity with our children. Our children must learn to recognise and experience the plight of those less fortunate than themselves first hand. Teach your child to give away excess toys, school supplies and clothes they have outgrown each season. Just talking about these values is really of no consequence; but living it is an enriching experience.

5 EXPOSURE TO OTHER VALUES

“It is impossible to protect your child from all outside influences, but a well-established value system is like a safety helmet,” Hettie says. “When your child has it on, she can move around safely in dangerous situations.” ●