MAKE USE OF YOUR DINNER DATE!
IT’S NOT SO OFTEN THAT DINNER DATES TURN OUT TO BE THOSE PERFECTLY ROMANTIC EVENINGS BATHED IN CANDLELIGHT, BRIMMING WITH MEANINGFUL GLANCES AND AMAZING FOOD TO BOOT. IN REALITY, DINNER DATES TEND TO BE SLIGHTLY NERVE-WRECKING AFFAIRS FULL OF POTENTIALLY FIRST-IMPRESSION-BUSTING DECISIONS: WHERE SHOULD YOU GO? IF YOU GET STEERED TOWARD A BAD SEAT NEAR THE KITCHEN, SHOULD YOU SAY SOMETHING OR JUST DEAL? WHO SHOULD PAY, AND HOW MUCH SHOULD YOU TIP THE WAITER? FOLLOW THESE TIPS FROM VETERAN RESTAURANT EMPLOYEES AND REAL DATERS AND YOU’RE GUARANTEED TO MAKE A GREAT FIRST IMPRESSION AND BE ABLE TO FOCUS ON WHAT YOU’RE REALLY HERE FOR: EACH OTHER. DO choose a place you have been to before. Even if you have only been there for lunch, knowing your surroundings will make you more confident, comfortable, and therefore much more attractive to your date. Trying a new restaurant can cause date-night anxiety if you are in a new environment. The restaurant could also be too loud,take forever to seat you,or have terrible food — all of which can throw a major wrench in the works. DON’T go somewhere too familiar. If the maitred', busboy and line cook know who you are, if you are shown to your “usual table,” if the wait staff knows your preferred salad dressing and your steak temperature, that's not necessarily a good thing. You may aim to impress, but your date is most likely to wonder how often you bring dates there. You may well want to share your favourite haunts, just not on the first date. DON’T choose a place too close to home. If a guy took me to a spot right around the corner from his place, that is the least effort he could possibly put into a date. While your “old standby” may be comfortable, remember that you are not dating for comfort. You want passion! Romance! Excitement! Also, keep in mind that if you tell your date how conveniently close you live to the restaurant, he or she may assume you intend to end the night back at your place. The place next door may have charm, sophistication, and a fabulous chocolate soufflé, but save it for the third date. DON’T be afraid to ask your date if there are any food restrictions to be aware of. This rule applies to dates with possible vegans, vegetarians, smokers, nonsmokers, spicy food enthusiasts, meat lovers and sushi haters. Don't assume that someone will like something just because you do. Avoid an obvious dating snafu by having the foresight to ask about preferences up front. DO steer clear of shenanigans. Wandering violin serenades, waiters dressed like Elvis and other forms of mealtime entertainment might seem fun or romantic in theory, but in truth, they can distract you from getting to know each other. Even if you've been there before, a quick phone call or glance at a website may prevent a lot of trouble. Find a place where both of you will be able to focus on each other. DO splurge on a good table. Whether you choose an intimate Old World bistro or a breezy sidewalk café, the one thing you don't want is to be in the way. Avoid potential jostling, spilling, and apologizing by requesting a certain table when you make the reservation. This is another circumstance in which knowing the restaurant comes in handy. If you haven't made a reservation or don't know which table to request, explain that you want a private table, not too close to the kitchen — or one with a view… whatever will make the evening special. DON’T feel obligated to go somewhere expensive. While you may hope to impress, you may end up intimidating your date instead. Opt for a laid-back atmosphere, which will make you both feel comfortable and will nurture conversation. Save the Four Seasons for your anniversary. assume anything when it
DON’T comes to the check. We know it's unfair, but even in this day and age, men usually pick up the tab on the first date. But that doesn't mean a woman should just sit there and assume that's going to happen or make a convenient trip to the rest room when it's time to pay up. Men, it appears, still appreciate when women make a genuine offer to split the bill — and this means you not only reach for your purse but open it, ladies (make sure you have cash handy in case he accepts). While he likely will refuse, this gesture shows you appreciated
his company and didn't just show up for the free surf 'n turf. DO Take care of your server. Tipping says a lot about a person. Adhering to gratuity standards is a good idea. “I was a waitress for four years, so I always look to see what they tip,” says Paulin of her dates that pay the tab. “If it was anything under 18 percent, it would be a small strike against them.” Figuring the tip is easy: take the total and move the decimal point one space to the left, and you have 10 percent. Double it, and you have 20 percent. Unless the service has been a nightmare, that 20 percent can be an investment in your date's opinion of you. DO be discreet. Paying or tipping should always be done as smoothly and as subtly as possible. Do not make clumsy, boorish errors, such as arguing over how much each person owes, using large bills to pay for small checks or gregariously grabbing the check out of the waiter's hand to demonstratively pay with your credit card. Such behavior makes people feel beholden and uncomfortable. Just pay the check, move it to one side and be done with it. DO plan for the best.if things go well, then what? Say you're having an amazing night that you never want to end. Great! Unfortunately, the lights are up, the tables are empty — and the waiters are yawning. It's time to leave, but see if your date's up to continuing the fun. Being prepared can help stretch a good time into a great evening.