HEWAS A SAVIOUR TO THE DISTRESSED
Balapuwaduge Neville Felix Mendis hailed from Moratuwa and also had roots in the South where his maternal grandfather Hendavitarana Uparis de Silva was a scion and philanthropist in Balapitiya. He was the younger son of Balapuwaduge James Alfred Mendis and Hendavitharana Robel de Silva.
Neville studied at Prince of Wales College, Moratuwa. He was a brilliant student who joined the Postal Department and rose to become the Superintendent of Mails. This was a key position where his administrative skills were displayed in handling his staff and mailing processes of the entire Island with 22 regions under his command. By dint of hard work and conscientious effort he passed the London University Bachelor’s Degree in Economics and was seconded for service in the Department of Immigration where once again his administrative skills were amply demonstrated. He was an officer with a conscience, who discharged his duties willingly, conscientiously and methodically. These were some of the professional hallmarks of Neville’s character.
But far above were the qualities of head and heart that stood out in his 97-year-old life which ended peacefully three months ago. Soft spoken and gentle, he never uttered a hard word in his life. He was quiet and subdued in the most turbulent situation. Whenever conflicts or differences of opinion occurred, he faced them calmly, intelligently and with remarkable poise. In his own inimitable style, he helped anyone who he felt was in need of help, with advice, counselling and guidance. He was a saviour to the distressed and it is hard nay impossible to find another member among his large circle of friends and family who did not receive his compassionate wisdom and assistance sometime in their lives. Discipline was the watchword that em- bellished his life. He was an expert swimmer and excelled in sports. The importance of physical exercise to keep a healthy mind in a healthy body was regarded by him as an integral part of daily life and continued this way of his life even when in fragile health. This was undoubtedly one of the reasons why even at the time he breathed his last he was mindful, and fully conscious – a rare feature among many seniors of the present day. A strict nonsmoker and teetotaller free of all vices, in every way an exemplary life, Neville was a veritable Bodhisatva. In accomplishing the noble qualities that crowned his life, he was supported by his wife Charlotte, a sweet and gracious lady, daughter of Station Master Benjamin and Nellie Warusavitane of Hikkaduwa. Neville’s sons Ananda and Nihal domiciled in Australia and his two daugh- ters Swarna and Chitramala all adored their father and rallied round him throughout life to make his last years on earth comfortable, peaceful and happy. Swarna was beside him every moment of the day even with nurses hired to help in medical care; yet, her benign presence added a touch of loving endurance to his life. Neville was blessed with caring children who came into the family, Marie, Kushmie and Sunimal de Soysa and also six adoring grandchildren. Thus his life was full and complete in every way – a life which everyone who knew him are proud of and fortunate to have been a part of and even wish they could emulate. Sudu mama was my maternal uncle, fair, handsome and a real good looker with noble traits of character that few could surpass nor even match. He was the star in our families to whom even older relatives turned to, for intelligent, reliable guidance that each of us received whenever the need arose.
The Buddha defined a wise man as “one who stands like a solid rock unshaken by worldly praise or blame, amid the vicissitudes of life.” This was that solid rock – my uncle Neville Mendis – our Sudu mama.
Fading away like dew in the morning,
Losing its light in the glorious sun,
Thus would we pass from earthy and its toiling,
Only remembered by what we have done
We have memories – only of affectionate moments, gentleness, intellectual prowess that he left behind for us to treasure and inspire us forever. May his sansaric journey be peaceful and blissful until he soon realizes the supreme goal of Nibbana! Srima Warusawithana
Canada