DON'T FORGET THE NEW MUMMY
For the last nine months, you were everyone's favourite. Pampered and thoroughly looked after, you were indeed spoilt to the maximum. At the slightest mention of a food you liked, you were suddenly presented with an array of delicacies, bags were carried, doors were opened and seats were given up all in the name of your comfort. You were the extra special one, the one that everyone took an interest, rubbed belly and asked a million times about how you felt. Indeed you felt loved, cared for and delightfully pampered. Rightfully so for you are in the process of creating magic, you are giving up your body to carry this new human into the world. But all this came crashingly to a halt, the minute this tiny human, that aggravated every muscle and sinew of your body, comes screaming into the world.
Face it new mummy, you are definitely not the star attraction anymore. Centrestage has been taken by this cherubic beautiful angel, that has people cooing in utter delight at the crook of their little finger. Everybody wants to know how the baby is, whilst you are an after thought. You might have gone through 24hours of labour, body changing caesarean procedures, but everybody wants to see the baby. Enveloped in the utter bliss of new motherhood you don't take it personally. Your life is never your own anymore, but instead lived partly through your new child. Until you are whole again, new mothers, you have to ask for help. You have to stand up and say I am broken, I am sleep deprived, I don't really know what I am doing, I need help.
Advice to a new mother entering motherhood “To those whom much has been given, much is expected”, and as a new mother you have been given the greatest gift there is in existence, here are some helpful suggestions to make this an easy journey for you:
1. Do not be afraid to simply say “This is
difficult, I need help”. Even if others are to criticise on your laments, remember that at this moment, you want to be the best you can be for your baby. Taking time for yourself, getting help doesn’t make you a lesser mother. It makes you a better mother. Don’t let the whisperings of others influence you, you are not out there to win the best mother of the year award, all you want to do is look after your baby, be happy and healthy! 2. This too shall pass. In the wee hours of the morning after a continuous night of broken sleep and days spent routinely with your newborn, your journey at the beginning might seem long hard and hazardous with no end to it. But each phase will pass, only to make things a little easier for you. Your confidence as a new mother grows and each day will become easier and more joyous. 3. Prioritise your life: You have maternity leave for a reason, use that time wisely.
At this point in your life the only important thing should be your newborn and nursing your body back to health. Eat right, sleep when you can, don’t stress yourself with unnecessary hasslements if possible, allow these early months to overcome you for it is indeed a blessed period in your life and one which should be thoroughly cherished.
4. Get a little help from you friends. With your sudden new responsibility as a mother you assume you have to be super mum, which is not the case. Nothing will happen to your baby if someone else bathes or feeds her. When friends and family offer to help hold them to it and use that time to regain your own self. 5. Recognise your family’s new role. Now that you are mother of a child your family dynamics have also changed, you have acquired a new status in addition to being, wife, daughter, sister and so forth. Your current status as mother will be the most demanding at this point in your life. Do not feel stressed that you are unable to fulfill the other roles satisfactorily, this is just a temporary situation and one that doesn’t need to give you too much stress.
Motherhood is indeed an amazing journey that we embark on. Take comfort first time mothers, your time is here, cherish, enjoy it, be in the moment!