A gracious and kind lady
There were seven in our family, five boys and two girls. I am writing this as the eldest Dr. brother. Rita was the fourth in the family, born on April 11, 1934. My mother and father were both teachers, strict disciplinarians. Rita had her education at the Sacred Heart Convent, Galle, by the then Belgian Sisters of Charity. She was the bridesmaid at my wedding in 1952.
She entered the nunnery at the age of 19 in 1953 and had her training at SHC Galle. She was a science teacher in the school. She fell ill in 1955 with a peptic ulcer of the stomach and was treated by Dr. P.R. Anthonis, the well known surgeon who admitted her to the nuns’ ward at General Hospital, Colombo. At that time the treatment of peptic ulcer was by surgery and she had a gastro-entorostomy done.
She developed complications and started vomiting blood for which blood transfusion was given and she had a second surgery to stop the bleeding.
Ultimately within one year she had further surgery for the third time, ending up with doing a partial gastrectomy, removing 2/3rd of her stomach. After that I went to UK for my postgraduate studies in Liverpool, and she went to Dublin in Ireland to do her science degree. There she fell ill and was admitted to a hospital in Dublin and I had to fly to Dublin and discuss with the doctors there regarding all her surgeries and to manage her without doing any operations. I came back in 1960 and she also returned and was a science teacher at the Galle Convent. She was later transferred to the Matara convent to teach there and came back to Galle.
She was again admitted to the General Hospital Colombo with intestinal obstruction due to bowel adhesions following the previous operations. She was operated again for the fourth time by Prof. R.A. Nawaratna and recovered.
I was appointed to Galle General Hospital as a consultant in 1968. She used to visit me at the Galle hospital and discuss the problems she was facing in the convent. I advised her to leave the nunnery which she did in 1969. She came back home and remained with my mother.
She was very close to the Jesuits in Galle, especially Fr. Chianase and he brought a proposal of marriage from one Marcus Perera from Kalutara, and she got married at the age of 37 in December 1971 at St. Mary’s Church Dehiwela.
Marcus was employed at Associated Motorways at Kalutara. They lived in a house on St. Sebastian road at Katukurunda. They had no children. She however fell ill again, this time with glauco- ma of one eye. It was too advanced by the time I got her seen by an eye surgeon in Colombo and they had to remove her eye and give her a glass eye.
She again fell ill with pulmonary TB and stayed in my house for nearly three months.
Marcus died in 1982 and and she decided to do social service work and went for advice to the then young parish priest at Payagala Fr. Malcolm Ranjith, who advised her to visit Nagoda hospital and be of service to the poor patients there. This she did very diligently in 1982, till one day a leper approached her and she put up a cadjan shed and looked after him, dressing his wounds and giving him shelter and food. She named her house Marcsri combining the two names Marcus and Rita and it was later registered as a social service institution named” Marcsri Sarana Seva Niwahana” in 1983.
She appealed to the then Archbishop of Colombo Nicholas Marcus Fernando for financial help to construct a permanent building to house the many inmates who came to her for help. The Archbishop appointed Fr. Julian Thissera who was the parish priest in Katukurunda full time to help Rita, as he was also very keen on working with the poor.
As a medical man I am amazed that she lived up to 81 years and did this tremendous work, which no one in this country has ever done, with all her illnesses. She did all these with implicit trust and faith in the providence of God Almighty, singlehanded as a one woman show for the past 32 years.
Her love for the unwanted, mentally retarded and disabled children who were dumped on her doorstep by mothers, was great. She gave them an education. Many of them have been given in marriage and she has built homes for them.
Many philanthrophists from Sri Lanka and many from abroad have helped her over the years to continue this work .
Her final obsequies on the 28th afternoon was something that I had never seen in my life for an ordinary laywoman like Rita, where five Bishops, the Cardinal, Archbishop, two Archbishops Emeritus and two other Bishops concelebrated a Eucharistic celebration with a large number of priests, nuns and laity who filled the Marcsri Niwasa. Three other Bishops from Galle, Kurunegala and Anuradhapura paid her homage and conducted services earlier.
My sister Rita had implicit trust in God Almighty to run the home when she is gone. I am quite certain that she will intercede from heaven to continue this tremendous service to humanity . Her motto was “What you do to the least of my brethren, you do it unto me”.
Another gracious and kind lady of vintage times and the last of the elder generation of the Nugawela clan who lived and grew up in the historical and salubrious little village of Eladetta, Randessa, passed away recently after a brief illness at the ripe age of 96. Ruby Aluwihare was a daughter of the late T.B. Nugawela and Meraya Keppitipola Nugawela Kumarihamy and was sixth in a family of eight. She received her entire education at
Good Shepherd Convent, Kandy and lived a happy, comfortable and quiet life. She married Vincent Aluwihare of Matale who prede-
It is with profound sorrow that I write a few words in appreciation of my loving mother-in-law Mrs. Chandra Wijayakoon of Dehiowita who passed away after a brief illness on July 4, at my home in Bandaragama. She was 94 years. Her demise has brought deep sorrow to all of us.
She hailed from a very distinguished Sinhala Buddhist family. She was born on November 12, 1920, the third in a family of ten and educated at Musaeus College, Colombo.
She was blessed with four children, three daughters and a son - Hemamali, presently living in America, Chithra, Jaliya and Anoma. She was also blessed with ten grandchildren and two great grandchildren.
She lived with her son Jaliya, daughter Chithra and also with my wife Anoma. She had been with us at Bandaragama for nearly six ceased her. A mother of three sons and three daughters all of them being professionally qualified and successful in their chosen fields made her immensely proud.
Night had quietly replaced the gloaming in an already tranquil Lewella when I arrived to pay my respects to this gracious lady who was about the last of our generation. And as she lay in gentle repose surrounded by flowers in her beautiful home I had once more years until her death.
My sons and her other grandchildren were very fond of their `Grandma’. During the time when she was with us we took her to various places, including to tourist hotels down South on holiday. My sons Panduka and Jatila enjoyed her company. Chocolates were her favourite and whenever her daughter visited from the States she used to ask her to bring chocolates.
She was the pillar and key to the success of her children and gave them the best of education. Her husband, Jayasinghe Wijayakoon predeceased her five decades ago and her late son-in-law Siva who was a tower of strength to the family also passed away.
I remember my wife Anoma saying, “My amma was the root for our success. She encouraged come to say farewell to the past and for an era that had bonded our families firmly and when our lives had revolved on a different plane altogether. It was sad recalling those far-off times when I would go to Eladetta with my parents to spend the day and then be taken in charge of by Ruby my senior by several years, and plied with food and drink that simpIy overwhelmed me. And those were the times she lived with her siblings and led a me to do a job in the Government service and for me, my amma is the best mother in the world, no one can replace her in my heart.”
During her twilight days, all of us were privileged to learn valuable lessons from her. “Roses may bloom and die, but the fragrance of it never fades and your life was a sweet memory to many. You gave us everything, but never asked for anything back. To me you were the best and the greatest mother in the world, like my mother Kusuma Kannangara who passed away in 2004”.
Your departure is indeed a loss to your loved ones.
As a Buddhist I would like to say “May she attain the supreme bliss of Nirvana”. rather cloistered life under the warm wings of their parents in their elegant home at Eladatta which oozed history from its four corners.
In the years that followed, she grew old gracefully and had not lost the old world charm that was part of her. Cared for and showered with immeasurable love by her children she lived a quiet, sedate and sequestered life and in the closing years her inability to walk without assistance was hardly an affliction but was more an endowment granted by time to the aged which she accepted cheerfully.
Seemingly sad though it may be, death is inevitable and having led a sublime life her request that her obsequies be held privately was all about her humility and thoughtfulness. She has only passed on leaving indelible memories of her life and times in the hearts of her loved ones and on those who shared her warm hospitality and friendship.
May she attain the Bliss of Nirvana.