Eureka! Mangala reveals petrol pricing suththare
When Finance Minister Mangala Samaraweera admitted last week that he himself couldn’t make a head or tail of his own petrol pricing formula he had recently introduced to make the cost of living index rise even higher, it was akin to the sort of awkward situation that would have undoubtedly arisen had Einstein confessed in 1915 that he was baffled by his own theory and did not have the foggiest as to what his relativity hash was all about.
Speaking to the media at the UNP headquarters Sirikotha in Pitakotte on October 9, he said: “Even I cannot comprehend what this pricing formula is. When people come to know what this formula is, they will also be affected mentally.”
But within a week of giving it great thought and after doing his homework burning the midnight candle at both ends, Mangala had finally seen the light and come to know of it and shouted ’eureka’ when he found to his glee he had mastered the true import of the formula that had so eluded him for so long. So much so that he deemed the discovery worthy enough to hold a press conference on Thursday to announce the final cracking of petrol pricing’s elusive Da Vinci Code.
This Thursday the Finance Minister Samaraweera, flanked by State Minister Eran Wickremaratne and Finance Ministry Secretary Dr. R.H.S. Samaratunga, addressed a media conference to present his findings. And here it is:
For those scientific buffs who can fathom it, it’s simply this: MRP= V1+ V2+ V3+ V4. Got it. Good.
MRP, of course, does not stand for Mahinda Rajapaksa President but simply means Maximum Retail Policy. And the V1, V2, V3 and V4 do not stand for four times victory either.
V1 simply means, Mangala explained, V1 is the Landed Cost (Rs/Litre), which included Singapore Platts Price per Barrel, weighted Average Premium per Barrel, Loss due to the Evaporation and Exchange Rate (US$/ LKR) are applied. V2 stands for V2 is the Processing cost which includes local port charges, Transport Cost, Dealer’s Margin including losses due to Evaporation to dealers and stock holding cost.
V3 is the administrative expenses including personnel Cost, depreciation and other cost elements, if any.
And V4 is about the taxation which includes Customs Import Duty, Excise Duty, Ports and Airports Development Levy and National Building Tax.
So there you have it, boiled down to its quintessence and served in the clearest mathematical terms.
Next time you line up to fill your tank at the newest petrol price arrived at by the application of Mangala’s MRP= V1+V2+V3+V4 formula and understand why petrol prices have to be raised month by month as a demand of reality, realising Einstein’s theory of relativity expressed in the equation, E= mc2,will be child’s play. And even as you dish out more for your petrol take heart. And give yourself a hearty pat on the back. For if you can make head or tail of it: You are no dumb sucker. You are a bally genius.
Where ignorance once made you curse the flaming fuel price hikes, enlightenment of MRP= V1+ V2+ V3+ V4 will surely help to douse the burning hole in your pocket. And keep your sanity on even keel.
Alas for those who cannot, the only consolation is to ask: Are you Game For a Laugh?
PS. The Minister also said that the tax levied in Sri Lanka is low compared to the other countries in the region. “The tax levied on petrol in India was SL Rs. 82.14 and diesel SL Rs. 47.52 but in Sri Lanka it was Rs. 53.68 for petrol and Rs. 25.48 for diesel. In England Rs. 178.70 for petrol and Rs. 180.27 for diesel.” Is that so? Really? How comforting to know we are far better off than the Indians and the British.