If change is to come to our nation it must begin with us, ordinary citizens
No one realized early in the morning of Easter Sunday, April 21, 2019, that events later would shatter all our lives. Although many of us did not lose a loved one or a friend - the numbness, sense of shock and grief enveloped the whole nation. As I write this, it is about six weeks since the blasts. So much more has happened subsequently.
Many families lost more than one loved one and their lives will never be the same. For those who are still in hospitals, the physical pain is compounded by the emotional trauma as they try to understand what really happened. What does one say to a mother who weeps inconsolably for her child snatched away, or to a child left with no parents? What can one say except stand beside them in their grief.
What do I say to a 14-year-old Muslim girl when she weeps? She is sad and angry that some men in the name of Islam killed so many innocent people. She harbours a sense of shame which is heightened when someone looks at her community in condemnation and judgment. These young ones are made to feel that all are responsible for the carnage.
I discuss with some children who
a terrorist is - an individual who kills in the name of religion or an ideology, but in reality is one who does not represent any true religion. A terrorist ‘terrorizes’, and cannot represent his/her ethnic group. So how would we define what happened in the North Western Province when terror was unleashed? I talk to the group of children about terrors of the past that I knew: that of the JVP and the LTTE. These groups did not represent their communities.
I hear many voices of fear since April 21. For many younger folk this is their first experience of a bomb and its devastating effects that endure long after the explosion. A lot of them now sleep with their parents. Thankfully many say that they feel school is a safe place. I hear the sense of sadness felt by some, when friends and adults talk of staying away from Muslim owned shops and restaurants. As a Sinhalese I feel a sense of shame. We’ve lived side by side as neighbours for over 40-50 years; I grew up in a school where we saw each other not as from different communities, but as fellow schoolgirls forming one community, one family.
We let the terrorists win if we divide a nation on ethnic or religious lines. All four major communities are represented on our flag and all religions teach us a common humanity; one of compassion, kindness, forgiveness and tolerance.
My life has been the richer for knowing those of other faiths and communities. I am grateful for a home where we grew up learning to love and respect all people. We were taught by the example our parents set and I hope we have passed that on to succeeding generations.
So, who IS my brother/sister? She who takes flowers to the kovil; He who goes to the mosque on Friday; one who takes flowers to the temple on Poya day and another who worships at a church on Sunday. Their lives and well being are inextricably linked to mine. So YES, I am my brother’s keeper!
I love the African story which talks of “Ubuntu” which means “How can I be happy when others are sad?” It also means: “I am - because we are”!
So I weep with the families of the bomb victims and those whose lives have been shattered. I also weep with my Muslim brothers and sisters who are made to feel a sense of shame for something they never did. I so want to believe that there is much good in very human being, as I believe we are all made in the image of God. We cannot and must not let the worst in us come out because of our suspicions and prejudices.
We cannot let fear dominate our rational thinking. We know better and must listen to each other, and sow seeds of understanding where mistrust grows; to talk and have conversations face to face, and on social media. To build relationships rather than destroy. If change is to come to our nation it must begin with us, the ordinary citizens of our land.
In the words of Martin Luther King Jnr.:
Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.