Is winning medals barometer of success?
We need a hundred Mathew Abeysinghes, says swimming great Bolling
The measure of success in any sphere of activity or life is without doubt the happiness you derive from achieving your target. In the wide world of sports many of us are under the mistaken notion that the adrenaline which drives one to go faster in pursuit of glory is the ultimate prize. The thrill of victory and agony of defeat is much hyped like a double-edged sword driving a wedge in the hearts of even seasoned campaigners. Although it is acknowledged that competition helps to raise the bar, it may not bring eternal joy to those who savour triumph and bask in its glory.
Three- time Olympian Julian Bolling has embarked on a mission to educate the hearts and minds of coaches to teach with love and respect emotions of athletes instead of driving them to the extreme to win at any cost. Every fortnight he goes into a huddle with coaches in Sri Lanka and around the region via webinar on 3-D Coaching.
He was of the opinion that even 2000 Sydney Olympics silver medallist Susanthika Jayasinghe was exploited to some extent.
“When Susanthika brought a medal, everybody was happy. But we used her as spectators when she brought us happiness. Okay she made some choices in life. But coaches coached her for the medal but never coached her to train her heart,” he claimed.
“All of us dream to win an
Olympic medal and when an Olympian wins a medal you are happy. Do you know how many athletes are suffering today? If you are in the national pool and you are given some incentives, suddenly an injury comes because of running, you are taken out and forgotten. Sriyani ( Kulawansa), ( Damayanthi) Darsha and Sugath ( Tillakaratne) all three have told me. You and I are using the Darshas to give us happiness and then they are put on the street,” he said.
“How many parents are hoping that the other child fails so that my child will be selected. Better athletes’ parents has a better seat in the stand. They are fighting for that. What if a certain family says our values are different and educate the children ‘look we will do our best but we will enjoy this’. They might win or not win but irrespective of it, the win does not make you happy. Life makes you happy. The win musn’t,” said Bolling giving as an analogy the role of family in performance in sports.
“Fatherlessness is the biggest problem in the world. We coaches should become father coaches,” he felt.
“My kids spend more time with teacher and coaches than their parents. If they are not real fathers and mothers, then there will be a problem. As parents we need to look at that,” acknowledged a rugby coach.
“We the principals and coaches of schools must ask the question ‘what are we doing?’ We have to put everything aside and start all over again. If we don’t enjoy sport, I don’t want to be part of it,” said Bolling.
For someone who was egged on by competition at the peak of his career, 3- Dimensional Coaching has enforced a change of heart in the former Sri Lanka swimming great.
“3D made me suddenly realise there is another side to it. The physical and mental aspects as a coach, as players everybody does it. This has been there for donkey’s years. The third dimension is creating emotions and love. The first two are good but they have found out 3D is creating better results, better people and giving a lot to these athletes. For example, research has shown your recovery from injury is faster if you are happier person,” he said.
“If you want performance giving drugs, I have a new one. TLC – Tender Loving Care,” he quipped.
Asked the perennial question, how Sri Lanka can win another Olympic medal, he was candidly forthright.
“To win an Olympic medal we need a hundred Mat h ew Abeysinghes. We both won SAF (South Asian Games) medals. I am very proud of Mathew. I don’t envy Mathew. I love his work ethic. I am a fan of his because of the way he swims and as a person. You need 100 top swimmers, then the competition becomes more in Sri Lanka,” he said.
He suggested a three-step solution to create the environment for it - calendar has to be set, rewards should be there and of course transparency while adding another important element called High Performance.
“If you create these three, the private world will create the competition. I am talking about Olympic sports not football, rugger, netball or cricket. The most competitive thing in Sri Lanka and only thing going right is the A/L exam. The entire country is competing. There is a tuition industry. You go to any town, you get posters, banners, etc. It is the only thing in country that is consistent,” he said.
In contrast even a Sri Lankan cricketer doesn’t know when is the domestic calendar whereas everyone knows when is summer in England or Australia when cricket is played.
“To some extent in rugby the Bradby calendar is always set and the reward is a massive trophy. And because the stakes are high and you create that competition, the two schools will lift the standard up,” he said.
“When you are climbing a ladder, Olympics is the bench mark. We are at the third step. We have to think of four and five. Apart from calendar, rewards and transparency, there is one more thing, the language called high performance. You can’t put a Grade 6 teacher to create A/ L results,” he said wondering whether people in authority know what high performance is.
Even America, acknowledged as the leading Olympic nation where some of the biggest stadiums are owned by universities and boasting of the richest sports leagues, are going through a period of soul searching because research shows 70% of children are quitting sports before they turn 13.
“So now the question is, if you look at success through results, then America is successful. It depends on what lens you are using to look at sport. What if 70% are quitting,” he asked.
“Why are they doing sports? Is it for us? Yes, when swimmers pass, I feel good. But if I wait for that I am not doing my son a favour. It’s the son doing me a favour,” said Bolling leaving us with some delectable food for thought.