My Dad - my hero

How do I start to write an appreciation about a father who was an extraordinary human being?

Daddy was born on April 12,1929, to Tribusius and Thangamal Motha. He was the fifth of eight children; theirs was a very simple and humble family. He married my mum Nirmala Pereira on October 21, 1961 and they had five daughters. Family meant everything to my dad. I fondly remember how when I was a child, he would make my milk and give it to me every morning and make a cup of tea for my mum too and give it to her in bed. He believed in making everyone in the family happy and always put others first.

Daddy was a very simple man. An incident that made a long lasting impression on me was a day when I went out with him to a shop, when I suddenly realised he was not wearing footwear. It didn’t bother him. He got down from the car and went into the shop barefoot – that was when I realized that the simplicity in my dad was something we could all learn from. He was never proud nor did he believe in showing off. He was humble to the core. He would always want to oblige everyone and found it difficult to say no.

My childhood was filled with happy memories. Dad loved spending time with us and I remember him patiently covering our schoolbooks and pasting name tags. He used to pick us up from school daily and take us out for a treat. Our trips to Bolgoda were so special and I will hold them in my heart forever.

After marriage I lived next door to my parents’ home. Dad was a wonderful father-in-law to my husband and a doting and loving grandfather to my children looking after them as babies as he loved them so very much. He was also very generous and giving, always wanting to help others and went out of his way to do so but always with a low profile, as he used to advise me ‘don’t let your left hand know what your right hand does’.

Dad taught us to live a good life by example. He avoided conflict, was soft spoken and always with a smile. He also had a sense of humour and would try to make everyone feel comfortable with a joke. He always reminded me that “peace begins with a smile”. He was kind, patient, loving, wellmannered, gentle, quiet and humble. What more can you ask of a father who was everything to me?

Daddy stopped walking five years ago after a spine injury. Since he was always an independent and active man who never asked anyone to do anything for him, it broke my heart to see him in a wheelchair. We did our best to make sure he was comfortable despite this setback. I cherish the many chats I had with Daddy, where he shared childhood stories with me. As the only two children living in Sri Lanka, my sister Diane and I made sure we did our best for our dad. Even though I have three children of my own, right to the very end, he would still wait till I came to see him every morning and would always call if ever I went out and came back late. Ours was a special bond.

He would often take my hand and say ‘don’t ever leave me’. Daddy - I am sorry I had to let go of your hand as God had plans for you. You were a great father. We were indeed blessed to have you and call you dad. You always told me, ‘I don’t know what you will do when I am gone’. I am confident that you are in the safe arms of our Heavenly Father and all our loved ones gone before. I also know you would not want me to be sad.

I know that we will meet again on that beautiful shore and that you will continue to watch over us and be our guardian angel in heaven. Goodbye Daddy. Thank you for everything you have done for me.

I love you so much.

Your youngest daughter