Life is precious and Sumithrayo is always ready to give a helping hand

48 years of service to the community

“The most important thing in communications is to hear what isn’t being said” – Peter Drucker

People who have lived through a suicide attempt often talk about reaching the point where they could see no alternative. Realising that they did not want to die but instead wanted someone to intervene and stop them. Many say that they actively sought someone who would sense their despair and ask them whether they were okay.

They were not looking for specific advice, they said, but that compassion and empathy from others helped to turn things around for them and point them towards recovery.

Sumithrayo works to prevent suicide and support those who have lost someone to suicide. They also provide those feeling sad, lonely, desperate, or in need of emotional support a caring nonjudgmental friend who would listen with complete confidentiality.

Focusing on empathetic active listening and non-judgmental responses, the aim of the Sumithrayo volunteers is to empower the caller to make lifeenhancing choices – to find their own solutions or answers, where solutions or answers exist, not to offer external direction or advice.

It was Joan Hamilton who set off from London in 1971 to marry Lakdasa De Mel, the first Bishop of Kurunegala, who began Sumithrayo on June 15, 1974. A branch of the Samaritans, Sumithrayo first operated out of two rooms at the Ceylon Social Service League in Maradana. Later Joan and Lakdasa de Mel gifted their property in Horton Place and helped build the Centre at 60B Horton Place. Samaritans founder Chad Varah travelled from London to lay the foundation stone at 60B. Like the Samaritans, It was Joan’s vision to provide these services free of charge.

Active Listening pays an integral part of the process of befriending. On a basic level, Active Listening takes the focus off the helper and puts it on the person being helped (the person in crisis). Thus it alleviates some of the isolation, loneliness, low self-esteem, and the feeling that nobody cares, which often accompanies bouts of depression. Active listening tells the person in crisis that what he/ she is feeling is important and helps in getting their feelings out in a safe and supportive environment, thereby acting as an all-important emotional pressure release valve, which is a “protective factor” in preventing suicide. A catharsis.

Bereavement or grief due to suicide is experienced very differently from the mourning of a loss by natural causes. The stigma associated with suicide makes it difficult for others to reach out – unsure of what words of comfort to offer. As a result, a wall of silence is built by friends, family and the community who may discuss the suicide in hushed tones amongst themselves. Survivors may go through feelings of guilt or blame that they were the cause or did not do the needful to prevent the suicide. They may choose to deal with it by denial or avoiding discussing it. If the grieving process is not allowed to proceed some survivors may place themselves at risk for suicide. It is very important that the bereaved seek assistance, but the stigma often prevents them from seeking help.

At Mel Medura, ( an ancillary of Sumithrayo established in 1984) located in an adjoining building on the same premises, the focus is on assisting those with substance dependence. Alcoholism and drug dependence are complex problems, and helping a loved one struggling with alcoholism or drug dependence can be heartbreakingly painful for families.

Trained befrienders at Mel Medura work with the substance user in a relaxed and friendly setting to find the root of the addiction and help them progress into sobriety. Depending on the underlying cause of the addiction, the befriender develops an individual plan for each user. Befrienders also educate them about addiction and teach them how to move on. The main goal of the befriender is to guide the drug user or abuser into sobriety and a healthier lifestyle.

Sumithrayo is open 365 days – from 9 a.m to 8 p.m (including holidays).

Tel: 2692909, 2683555, 2696666 (Mel Medura: 2694665. 2693460, 0714307799)