White House in-tray still looking a bit grim

When Barack Obama won the US presidential election more than eight years ago, the BBC commented that when he took over the White House from George W Bush a few months later, he would be inheriting “the in-box from Hell”. They weren’t far off the mark and you only have to look at the colour of Mr Obama’s hair these days to know it hasn’t exactly been a bundle of laughs.

But he can’t really complain. After all, he wanted the job.

When Donald Trump takes over after next Friday’s inaugural, we know the in-tray will still be pretty grim and most likely grimmer than grim.

However, there will probably be a lot more interest in what shows up in Mr Trump’s out-tray, considering all those promises made on the campaign trail.

It could be fun. Let’s hope it’s fun anyway because the alternative doesn’t bear thinking about.

If his first press conference is anything to go by, we are in for entertainment that goes far beyond anything House of Cards can dream up.

It was unabashed political theatre. In these turbulent times, one wonders why anyone would aspire to be a president, prime minister, dictator, despot, tyrant or even Tsar of Twitter.

Political columnist David Broder once wrote: “Anyone who wants the presidency so much that he spends two years organising and campaigning for it is not to be trusted.”

A bit harsh perhaps, and maybe he should have added “and must be a little bit daft too”.

Because really, who in their right mind would really want this job? Over to you, Mr Trump.

Sax appeal

Mr Trump will reportedly attend just two inaugural balls, unlike Mr Obama who managed to squeeze in 10, while Bill Clinton holds the record, showing up at 14 such events.

But he did have a musical incentive. In 1993, the newly elected president Clinton got up on stage with a saxophone in hand borrowed from the great soul singer Ben E King.

He proceeded to blast out a solo of Your Momma Don’t Dance (And Your Daddy Don’t Rock n’ Roll).

There’s not many world leaders who could do that.

I don’t think Margaret Thatcher ever tried it.

One suspects that if George W Bush had picked up a sax at his inaugural, the auditorium would have emptied pretty rapidly and they would have sent for the men in the white coats.

As far as I know, Mr Trump doesn’t play a musical instrument, which is probably just as well.

But you never know. In the last couple of months, the president-elect could have been taking intensive lessons and might just get up on stage on Friday and let forth with a few blasts of Back in the USSR. Well, perhaps not that number.

President Ronald Reagan certainly didn’t play the sax at his inaugural in 1985, but his did display some typical Reagan humour.

It was so bitterly cold they had to move the ceremony from the steps of the US Capitol to indoors for the first time since 1945.

During his speech, Reagan stated “We stand again at the steps of this symbol of our democracy” before realising he was inside and not standing on any steps at all.

He quickly added: “Or we would have been standing at the steps if it hadn’t gotten so cold.” Well done, sir.

Acting up

Someone unlikely to be getting an invitation to the inaugural shindig is his outspoken critic Meryl Streep, the winner of multiple Oscars and Golden Globe awards or, as Mr Trump described it in his own inimitable style, “one of the most overrated actresses in Hollywood”.

This is from the same person who only two years ago called Streep an excellent actress “and a fine person too”.

To be fair, Mr Trump, who has actually appeared in 11 movies primarily starring as “himself”, did win one film award, a “Razzie” (Golden Raspberry), for Worst Supporting Actor in the 1991 film Ghosts Can’t Do It.

And of course, he even has his own star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, around which a disenchanted artist recently built a small wall, topped with barbed wire and the message “Keep out!”

Walking the dog

At the time of writing, it is still not clear whether Mr Trump will have a pet dog in the White House. If he doesn’t, he would be the first president in 150 years not to have some sort of pet.

The president-elect doesn’t really strike me as a dog person, but he will no doubt be well aware of Harry Truman’s wise advice to would-be presidents: “If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog.”

According to the Washington Post, a long-time friend has offered Mr Trump a Goldendoodle puppy, a mix between a golden retriever and a poodle.

The potential “First Dog” is named Patton after the World War II general whom Mr Trump greatly admires.

According to the Post, “Trump is apparently still weighing the appointment” of the dog for presidential duties. After all, it’s not every hound that gets to move from the doghouse to the White House.

It might have to learn a few tricks, though. Franklin D Roosevelt’s Scottish terrier called Fala used to stand proudly on its hind legs whenever The Star-Spangled Banner was played.

As for Warren Harding’s Airedale called Laddie, it was so clever that it even had its own cabinet seat.