IT IS REPORT CARD TIME FOR BOTH STUDENTS AND THEIR PARENTS

The report card given is not only a reflection of the child’s effort but also of their parent’s attitudes.

Where is that report card excitement of the old days? Whilst the parents curiously waited to see their children’s grades, the children strived to bring in a good report card. Failing a course and sitting for the make-up exam or the thrill of being given a certificate of achievement or merit made the best of memories for the students. Even those who were looking for excuses not to study, would get in line for the oral exam. Calculations were made on how to get even half a point more. Now, however, parents can follow the students’ grades instantaneously online, and they know more or less what grade their children will get. In truth, since failing a class got more difficult and raising your grade became easier, that old thrill of getting a report card has decreased. Even though that dither has diminished, report cards and presents still matter!

If the grades of the child are high and if s/he has brought home a good report card, a good atmosphere and a feeling of being proud prevails in the house as a result. The child only thinks of the presents they will be given and the nice holiday that will follow.

How to Approach a Child if Their Report Card Is Good ?

You must emphasize that the child’s grades are the result of the effort they spent and of their labor-intensive studies throughout the semester. The nice words and the congratulations are not only for the grades but also for the effort and studying. The best present for a child is the appreciation of their parents. The child has already been rewarded for their studies by the high grades. Doing an activity the child enjoys such as going to a place the child loves can be the best approach to a small celebration. Among the unhealthiest of approaches is belittling success. This attitude trivializes the effort spent throughout the entire term, the studying, and the subsequent success. The child feels inadequate thinking that whatever the child may do, they will not be

appreciated by their parents. Either the child can be totally discouraged or find themselves engulfed in a “harmful” ambition. Another unhealthy approach is to have exaggerated celebrations and get expensive gifts. These do not reward learning, curiosity, and the process but solely the result and high grades. Learning gets deviated from its aim and the focus shifts from learning to gifts.

If the grades are high, everything seems to be easy. If the grades are low, the child gets demoralized.

The child fears heavy accusations, criticism, or punishment from their parents for a bad report card. For a child whose success is a matter of discussion, a report card is “evidence” and leads to a feeling of “inadequacy.” The idea “I’m an unsuccessful student” feeds this feeling, and this does not only exacerbate failure, but it also tarnishes the soul of the child. The lack of self-confidence is not limited to school performance and can also find repercussions in other areas. The other feeling that is felt is dismay and the feeling of guilt that accompanies it. The child who would like to present a good report card or who is expected to present a good one feels guilty and dismayed.

How Does the Family of a Child Who Brings a Bad Report Card Feel?

Families get upset if they face an outcome other than what they expected. But this should not mean that the parents are right in doing so. On the other hand, they tend to feel a deep-set anxiety which stems from a fear of the future. The fear that their children will fail in the future leads them to experience this feeling. Besides, the feeling of remorse and guilt born out of thinking “Where did we go wrong?” also manifests itself.

How to Treat a Child Who Brings a Bad Report Card?

In order to establish healthy and result-oriented communication, the parents need to know in depth what the child feels and to be aware of their own sentiments. The healthiest step is to hold a mini-meeting. The emotions that are felt must be conveyed in the appropriate manner and it

should be made clear -if the child does not have a special condition or circumstance hindering their success- that the report card is a natural result of their actions. It is important to emphasize that there is no need to point fingers and this situation can be reversed by bonding as a family, and that with everybody owning up to their responsibility, a higher level of success can be achieved. Next semester’s plans should be planned in detail. In no way should there be any retributions. The child should not be deprived of a holiday and having fun.

Recommendations for Families

•In both its good and bad parts, this is also the report card of the guardians. Determine what you will be saying and the attitude you will display when you get the report card with that in mind.

•The report card does not reflect the personality of the child, only their performance and effort in a given period of time.

•If the grades are high, do not exaggerate your happiness, do not give the child ostentatious gifts, don’t lead them to think that “grades are more important than people.”

•If the grades are low, emphasize that you are sorry and say, “We will get down to the reason and work harder to overcome it.”

•Do not discriminate between subjects; the child’s world and your world could be different.

•The child’s grades may not be low because they are not studying enough, but can be due to attention deficit, dyslexia, other learning difficulties, health problems, or emotional problems at home. Instead of getting angry, do your research and get support.

•Every child would like to hand a good report card to their parents/ guardians. There are certainly reasons that are hindering their success.