Is formal education equal to happiness?

Afew days ago, a video went viral in Mexico, about a young girl (Mars Aguirre) who had “consciously decided to drop school altogether”. It sent shock waves all across the country, and mockery followed. How could a girl that “doesn’t know how to make a tortilla” take such a decision?

I decided to watch her video and there she was clearly radiating fury and saying why she will not go to school anymore. She was not, in my view, a spoilt brat who hated homework but rather she appeared to be passionate, smart and quite accurate in describing some of the problems with our educational system.

The comments that followed her “rant” were mostly of deep disapproval: “You will end up washing toilets”, “You will be a nobody”, “Your daddy and mommy are the worst parents”, “If you were my daughter, you would get the belt” and so on.

It got me thinking that is it really a life-and-death situation if a person chooses not to follow the formal ways of education? Is it really bad to be washing toilets? I mean, is a janitor expected to be unhappy doing his job? Is he or she a “nobody”?

So I asked myself, what would I think if my children were to tell me straight: “Dad, I don’t want to study anymore”?

I have two kids, a boy turning 20 and a girl turning 16 this year. The answer is not simple but it’s not that complicated either and it came in the form of another question: Would I love them less if they turned out to be “losers”?

“No, I will love them the same,” a voice in me said loud and clear.

Torture their kids

I could not help but think of parents who happily torture their kids to get straight As. There are kids who are good in school, others not so, and I refuse to believe that one is better than the other.

My daughter is a brilliant student, she wants to be a scientist and gets straight As all the time, while my boy is a smart, charming and astute young man. I admire his courage and the speed with which he figures out lifesituations that take me days, but he also dropped out of a private college abroad (that cost me an eye).

I don’t think my boy is a “nobody” as he means the world to me and we have an incredibly close relationship. But he just won’t graduate from college. Before you ask, yes, I told him straight, “No school, no monthly allowance”. He understood and started working. For a year, he had to feed himself and is always dreaming about business that I hope I can help him set up one day. I know he has chosen a different path, a rather difficult one.

Some people ask me why I let him ruin his life and future. Why was I not strict enough? Well, he got well-acquainted with real old-fashioned discipline, if you know what that means, but it has been a long time since I knew that school was not his place.

Plus, I can’t forget about the many kids across the globe that have even taken their own lives to get out of that pressure. I prefer to have a happy son living his life than a son miserable or worse.

Yes, we are supposed to push them to be better than us, but we are not supposed to force them to do better than us.

I know my boy will be a better man than me, because he is the master of his life and does not have to be crushed under my materialistic or ego-driven expectations. Just as I know that the young girl in the video will also figure it out, especially in these technological times where knowledge and opportunities are accessible everywhere.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not dismissing formal education. I am as incredibly excited to see my girl in a lab coat unravelling the mysteries of the universe as anyone else, but that would be just a career choice that does not define their value as an individual.