When I lose my cool, and there’s always a good reason

SHYAM A. KRISHNA,

Senior Associate Editor

Why do I get angry? When I pay for service, I expect to be served well and on time. Now, you can imagine my fury when I was repeatedly denied prompt service at a government department in my hometown in Kerala, a South Indian state.

That was around 15 years ago. I had applied for the death certificate of my father-in-law and provided all supporting documents. A week had passed after the mandatory verification, yet I wasn’t given the certificate. The clerks told me that it was ready, and all it needed was the officer’s signature.

I made several trips to the corporation office. Each time

I went there, the officer wasn’t at his desk. People who do not do their jobs trigger anger in me.

But I wasn’t like this. Earlier, whenever I got angry, I never expressed it. I was shy. Not brave enough. In the last two decades, I became forceful and aggressive that my younger self wouldn’t recognise.

One of my pet peeves is motorists who jump the queue at right turns. When you have spent a good five minutes in a car queue, there are smart alecs who force their way through, making the rest of the law-abiding motorists look like fools. These are habitual offenders, and I’m sure they would be breaking laws in other aspects of life as well.

All kinds of people make the world. But my principle is not to allow the bad ones to get away with shoddy behaviour. They should be held to account.

Is it worth getting angry?

Many times our display of anger is a result of what we feed on — films that glorify violence, video games that thrive on ‘killing the enemy’. Or maybe it is the result of a bitter childhood experience. We always find reasons and excuses for our anger.

But ultimately, we are responsible for our anger and what results from it.

My years in the media have taught me one important lesson — every story has another side. Be willing to listen and learn. Often, I have found that it is just not worth getting angry.

So the next time you begin to get angry, pause for a while. Think of the other person. Present your view in the best way possible without raising your voice.