Monkey Out...

Infusion Magazine - - PREVIEWS -

So if 2014 was the year of deep- tech house monotony, as many clubs open­ing as closing ( are in­vestors re­ally that my­opic out here) and in­creas­ing com­pe­ti­tion and dwin­dling crowds, here are my pre­dic­tions for 2015.

More ‘ glam­orous, Instagram- per­fect’ beach clubs will open. Half will close as pun­ters re­al­ize Dhs500 for a sunbed, a luke­warm beer and the am­bi­ence of a morgue don’t quite add up.

Dubai’s clubs will fi­nally em­brace com­mer­cial­ism ( ha).

More ‘ fes­ti­vals’ will pop up overnight. NB def­i­ni­tion of fes­ti­val be­ing more than one act.

Enough Cham­pagne will be sprayed – not drunk – to ac­tu­ally solve the world’s wa­ter short­age. And peo­ple will ac­tu­ally laugh and pay for the priv­i­lege.

The An­gry Monkey will have a her­nia from all the inane, brain- de­fy­ing rub­bish that Dubai’s club­bers, pro­mot­ers, DJs and fans will spew forth. And I’ll se­cretly love ev­ery sec­ond of it. Bring it on f*** wits!

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