When is it appropriate to make such remarks to women?

Trump once again did what he does best: put his foot in his mouth. But, if you read the article below, you might just agree with the writer: was it really such a big deal?

“Y ou’re in such good shape… beautiful” was what US President Donald Trump — he who shoots his mouth off in a terribly unbecoming fashion most times — told Brigitte Macron, wife of his French opposite number, Emmanuel Macron. I thought, for a change, Trump was actually paying a lady a compliment. But reportedly, this is supposed to be “inappropriate”. So much so, that sports goods’ giant Reebok has promptly drawn up a chart to let all of us (who are only able to “read” when something’s illustrated in “graphic” format) know exactly when it is appropriate to say, “You’re in such good shape… beautiful”; turns out, the sentence can/should be mouthed if you “find a forgotten action figure from your youth, unscathed after decades, in your parents’ basement”. Not otherwise.

Now, I really don’t know what was going through Trump’s mind when he saluted Brigitte for being in great shape. Was he harbouring base thoughts about her and mentally undressing her? Was he trying to get too familiar — which is not a ‘diplomatic’ thing to do considering this was a state visit and all? Or was he being ageist — trying to be patronising to a woman who’s 25 years older than her husband?

Or maybe, just maybe, he was being none of the above, and was simply, thoughtlessly shooting his mouth off (and in a rather nice way this time).

Far more worrying than whether or not Donald Trump is Mr Creepy Crawly, is the spectre of idle speculation the media is in the grips of. News websites — and of course social media, how could I ever forget? — who are running short on story ideas, have been reduced to converting non-issues into issues faster than you can tweet your lunch order.

Most of the “reports” I skimmed through seem to exhort this was a “sexist” move on Trump’s part. “You’re in such good shape… Beautiful” is being dissected threadbare. Five words, plus one, six in all. Was the last word an afterthought? What was the inflection like? What about syntax? Was the emphasis on the word “such”? Or was the emphasis on “shape”? Was there attendant heavy breathing from the President (and not because of a chest congestion)? Did Brigitte recoil? Can we play those few seconds over and over and over again?

One of the British sites (express.co.uk) had this to say about that Kodak (vocal) moment — and this is posited next to an annotated photo of the moment itself: “Donald Trump is giving lots of mixed signals here. His chin is forward and he is leaning in slightly. His mouth is open, he has tight lip corners, is showing teeth and has a slack jaw. His hooded eyes are focused and his eyebrow corners raised suggesting a cross between a tense, awkward smile and the look of a python about to strike. Brigitte Macron has ended up holding Donald Trump’s hand, almost as if she is keeping him at arm’s length.”

You’ve got to be kidding me! Isn’t there anything more important — or more newsworthy — in the world left to analyse so hair-splittingly?

Someone I spoke to said the “outrage” of it depends on who the dramatis personae are. “It’s okay if a nice, reasonable man complimented me and said I was in great shape,” she said. “Not someone like Trump — he’s not a nice guy.” In principle, then, “you’re in such good shape” is not entirely inappropriate (even though Reebok seems to think otherwise).

Next, I asked a more “mature” friend about the ageist factor. “If you were over a certain age, and someone commented you were in great shape, would you consider that to be a slap on your face?”

“No, I’d love it,” she said. “Why do people [over a certain age or under] want to be in shape? To be healthy, yes, but also to be appreciated surely?”

I routinely keep seeing Instagram feeds and tabloid captions that say, “So-and-so (say, Sarah Jessica Parker) reveals her bikini body — and she’s in such great shape!” Every time Salman Khan or Shah Rukh Khan ramp up eight-pack abs, we all say, “Wow, he’s in such great shape!” Whenever Michelle Obama is spotted on her morning run, everyone will gush, “She’s in such great shape!” And on the same site where I read that Trump had the look of a python about to strike etc etc etc, there was a report on Eva Longoria flaunting “sexy curves and pert derriere” in Spain. I’m guessing she’s in such good shape too.

None of these are supposed to be “inappropriate”. But if someone tells you “you’re in such good shape” face to face, it’s suddenly ‘inappropriate’? Meh. I really think we need to get a life.

I really don’t know what was going through Trump’s mind when he saluted Brigitte for being in great shape. Was he harbouring base thoughts about her and mentally undressing her? Was he trying to get too familiar — which is not a ‘diplomatic’ thing to do considering this was a state visit and all? Or was he being ageist — trying to be patronising to a woman who’s 25 years older than her husband?