Make life’s turning points work for you
Turning points are critical moments of change that are beneficial. They may involve a choice at a crossroad in life (a career choice to be an entrepreneur rather than an academic that brings you more freedom), a sudden opportunity (an incidental television appearance that leads to a big show), a moment of truth (realising that your marriage is not working and that you must seek a better alternative), a crisis (being fired and moving to another state only to find your dream job) or an epiphany (a sudden business idea that brings huge success). Most people experience turning points as happening to them, yet there is often a long and arduous path with a build-up of capability and creativity that make turning points more likely.
Many people lived ordinary lives prior to the turning points that led to their success. At age 27, Vincent Van Gogh failed as a missionary and decided to go to art school. At age 28, JK Rowling was a suicidal single parent living on welfare and was rejected by over a dozen publishers before a small British press called Bloomsbury said yes four years later. At age 30, Martha Stewart was a stockbroker and wrote her first book at the age of 41 that led to her subsequent fame. Julia Child released her first cookbook at 49. And Morgan Freeman landed his first major movie role at age 52.
Turning points may seem to be serendipitous, but in those who examine them, there is a psychological hive of activity that appears to have led to their success. There are several principles that underlie the psychology of people whose lives have been punctuated by turning points. Here are the principles and suggested action to make a turning point more likely.
You can’t have a turning point if you keep doing what you’re doing. Prepare your brain to change course: Don’t be afraid to explore a viable career. You can’t anticipate that a stockbroker will become a famous television personality, but if you are open to what you desire and pursue opportunities in accordance
Turning points may seem to be serendipitous, but in those who examine them, there is a psychological hive of activity
with this, you are likely to find that turning point.
Action: What one other career would you consider right now? Look up related jobs online. Imagine what it would take to change or move.
You have to have the courage to see a turning point staring you in the face: Change is frightening, so much so, that many people ignore potential turning points in their lives. While this may be the case, focus is often a formula for missed opportunities.
Action: Of the many conversations you have had recently, which one may turn into an opportunity? Call up a related person and keep the conversation alive. Ask for introductions to other people.
Take time out for creative motivation: Sometimes, a turning point is not obvious. It requires a creative mind to see it. Go for a walk outside, preferably on a meandering path. It will stimulate creative ideas.
Action: After lunch or at time of day that suits you, go for a meandering walk every day.
Use possibility thinking: Often, we are stuck in habit pathways. And having a one-track mind won’t get you to a turning point. We have to consider possibilities for our brains to attend to them. If you don’t expect to pick any apples, you won’t carry a basket. Similarly, if you don’t expect something to come your way, you won’t prepare for it.
Action: Forget about your current reality. What do you want? And why is it possible?
These methods will likely jumpstart your brain so that turning points are more likely. In the same way that you can’t win the lottery if you don’t buy a ticket, you can’t experience a turning point if you don’t do all that you can to make it happen. —Psychology Today
Srini Pillay, M.D., is the author of the book: Life Unlocked: 7 Revolutionary Lessons to Overcome Fear. He is also an Assistant Clinical Professor at Harvard
Medical School