RISING STAR
Former flames Justin Bettis and Maurice Smith, from Philadelphia, reveal why they put their split behind them to host a new podcast that makes sure black queer voices are heard
Category Is... podcasters
What makes your podcast Category Is… stand out from the crowd? Maurice:
We’re black. We’re gay. We’re intelligent without being pretentious. We can talk about everything, from dating woes to Donald Trump, from careers goals to Cardi B. Our podcast is different because we speak with unique voices. At the core, we also have a great friendship that has lasted more than 10 years. That chemistry can’t be feigned — and, yes, we happen to be exes.
How did you meet?
M: We were at a bar called Bump, in the Philly “gaybourhood”. My roommate at the time was skittish about meeting some guy for a blind date so he asked me to go along to play “wingman”. Justin was there for happy hour with friends, saw me across a crowded room and approached. We went out the next day and dated for three years, which is for ever in the gay world.
Take it the break- up wasn’t bitter?
M: Erm…
Justin: Oh no, it was beyond bitter. Acrimonious is a better adjective. Maurice and I didn’t speak for almost a year — and when we finally met, some words were had!
Why did you decide to work together? A lot of people would find it very awkward working with an ex.
J: When we reformed a friendship, it was based on respect. It took a few years of setting boundaries and learning about each other in a new way. Working with a good friend is amazing because we know each other’s personalities, how to confront each other respectfully and how to play up our strengths.
There aren’t many podcasts hosted by black men, let alone black gay men. Do you think black voices still aren’t being heard enough, particularly within the LGBTQ community? J:
We’re from two communities that have historically been marginalised. There is an added layer of marginalisation when those two communities intersect. To be black is one thing, but to be black and gay takes things to a completely different level. People of colour are often silenced in the LGBTQ community, and some don’t feel empowered enough to share their voices. We couldn’t find a podcast with content that represented us, so we created one.
A lot has been written about how challenging it can be for black men to come out. Do you share that view?
M: Definitely. In black culture, so much — probably too much — emphasis is put on what a black man is, and is not. On the podcast, we talk about the harmful messaging of toxic masculinity and how it’s imprinted on us from a very young age. We’re taught that to be a man you have to be “tough”, disconnect from your emotions, fuck as many bitches as possible and play sports. That makes being your authentic, gay self extremely difficult.
How were your coming out experiences?
J: I had a very welcoming family. I made my coming out a bigger deal than it actually was.
M: I came out to my mum and she was tremendously supportive. Before I could tell my brothers and friends, I was outed by a guy I was involved with in college. Being outed robbed me of the empowerment to tell my story on my own terms. Many people I considered to be friends had a lot of negativity to spew, but I grew in immeasurable ways as a result. I felt like Scarlett O’Hara in the “God as my witness” scene in Gone with the Wind.
Racism within the LGBTQ is a huge talking point, with apps such as Grindr taking a stand against discrimination on their platforms. Have you ever encountered racism on the scene?
M: I’m in a relationship so I haven’t been on the apps in a while, but they’re problematic. The anonymity empowers people to state “preferences”, whereas in real life, they wouldn’t necessarily say, “No Fats. No Femmes. No Asians,” to someone’s face.
J: I was never shocked at the prevalence of racism on gay dating/ hook- up apps. Gay folk are not immune from white supremacy and patriarchy. However, I was shocked by how open people are in practising their racism. I almost think gay people feel it’s not detrimental because they have already experienced discrimination.
“I was shocked by how open people are in practising their racism”
What topic has sparked the most heated discussion between the two of you?
M: We disagree a lot about Kanye West and/ or the Kardashians. Social and political topics can also be contentious because I’m more conservative, while Justin is more liberal. We just agree to disagree.
Who would your dream guest be?
J: RuPaul.
M: We named The Duchess of Sussex as our 2018 person of the year. She needs to [ come along and] pick up her trophy!